Brush Your Hair Puns

A fuzzball was caught in my hair Dad: What's that on your forehead? Me: (I brush back my bangs and say in a british accent) The Scar?

And then we both burst out laughing and my mom and brother both just rolled their eyes. Not really sure if this belongs here, I just wanted to share.

We have recently been having problems with the plumbing, water draining very slowly etc. We tried different chemicals on different days to try and fix it before biting the bullet and getting someone clear them for us.

First day I started out with HCl and told my wife I was "going off to drop some acid." She groaned.

A few days later we switched to NaOH and I brushed my hair to the side and asked my wife if she liked my Skrillex impersonation. She told me it wasn't a very good impersonation. I said "hold your judgment for when I drop the base.".... She threatened me with a knife and told me to get out while laughing.