26 Hilarious Aware Puns - Punstoppable 🛑

Everybody knows about Murphy’s Law, but far fewer people are aware of Cole’s Law

It’s finely shredded cabbage in mayonnaise.

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👤︎ u/Tru-Queer

📅︎ Dec 27 2020

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Are clams self aware?

No, they are not conches.

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👤︎ u/sand_dunes37

📅︎ Nov 01 2020

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Are you aware adolescent

Rhymes surprisingly well with “I don’t listen”?

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👤︎ u/sarcasticpremed

📅︎ Oct 08 2020

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After reading this you might be an aware-wolf

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👤︎ u/straight-boomin

📅︎ Aug 06 2020

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I've heard that after a beheading, one remains aware for a few seconds afterwards

If that ever happens to you, quit while you're ahead

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👤︎ u/thefrechiest_fry

📅︎ Jun 02 2020

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My computer became self aware and asked for a snack.

I replied "Sorry I'm fresh out of computer chips."

EDIT: "Now he's asking me for a byte of cookies... "

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👤︎ u/guitarman1103

📅︎ Sep 26 2019

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**** PLEASE BE AWARE ****

We ordered a Chinese last from a local place in downtown (we won't name them) went to pick it up and as I was driving home, heard the bags rustling and moving!!!

I thought what on earth is that? Has something got in the bag? I thought I could see a little pair of eyes peering out.

I was driving so pulled over, I leaned forward, picked up the bag, put it on the passenger seat and there it was again, more rustling and little eyes looking out behind the chili beef.

I thought its got to be a rat or a mouse or something, so I carefully pulled the bag down ...

And there it was ...

A Peeking Duck

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👤︎ u/createsean

📅︎ Sep 13 2019

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Doctor: Are you aware of your sodium intake?

Me: Na

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👤︎ u/Gasyournan

📅︎ Oct 20 2019

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******The Hunchshaq of Notre Dame***** (Frame from the YouTube video “shaq eats a hot wing content aware scale”)

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👤︎ u/DeclanKav18

📅︎ Jul 20 2019

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The aware fishmonger knows his plaice

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👤︎ u/GaryTheKnight

📅︎ Nov 14 2019

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A careful wolf is aware wolf.

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👤︎ u/One_Day_Dead

📅︎ May 02 2019

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When a candle says "soy candle," has it become self aware and fluent in spanish?

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👤︎ u/YetiFromJersey

📅︎ Sep 22 2019

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Which is the most self-aware of the soups?

'Miso soup!'

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👤︎ u/Is_Actually_God

📅︎ May 15 2019

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Why is Dwayne Johnson's shadow not aware of recent news?

Its been living under a rock

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👤︎ u/aitchnyu

📅︎ Jan 01 2019

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Shout-out to all my self-aware beings out there.

You know who you are!

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👤︎ u/--Giraffe--

📅︎ Mar 31 2019

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When the parachute failed I became deeply aware of the gravity of my situation.

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👤︎ u/gargolito

📅︎ Jun 11 2016

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Even if you are aware, ask your lactose intolerant friends if they have other allergies.

It's good to make sure about anything more than their special dairytery needs.

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👤︎ u/Flieven

📅︎ Nov 29 2018

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A bartender asks a pirate if he's aware of the steering wheel on his groin

The pirate says "Yarr, it's drivin' me nuts"

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👤︎ u/PotatoesBeatYou

📅︎ Dec 16 2018

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My Dad was not aware that Dad Jokes were a thing...

Mom's Text to Dad - "My phone says it will be 95 on Saturday. I don't know what to do."

...

Dad's Reply - "Wish it a Happy Birthday."

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👤︎ u/PhayzR

📅︎ Oct 08 2015

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Were you aware that Bruce Lee had a cousin that always told the truth?

It’s serious, Honest-Lee.

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👤︎ u/Johnbob-John

📅︎ Oct 11 2018

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I was telling my girlfriend about how I needed to get something out of my truck. I guess I must have said this before, because she responded, "I'm aware, babe."

I responded, "So you are only a babe during full moons?"

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👤︎ u/Lunatic721

📅︎ Mar 27 2015

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When the first device with AI takes a picture of itself, it'll be selfie aware.

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👤︎ u/clit_or_us

📅︎ Mar 14 2018

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Those Kuwaitis never seem to be aware of anything that's going on in the news...

...it's like they live under Iraq.

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👤︎ u/BlackSpinXM

📅︎ Aug 21 2017

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More aware of the volume after subscribing to this subreddit

On Facetime with my mom today.

Mom: frtu, you should really cut your hair for your sister's wedding.
Frtu: Mom, do you know how long it took me to grow it out like this?
Mom: Don't worry it'll grow back.
Dad (in the background): But Karla, don't you realize he's attached to it?

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👤︎ u/frtu

📅︎ Sep 21 2014

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I wasn't aware my boyfriend was father material.

For clarification, Forest Hill is an elementery school in our town.

Anyway, we were driving to go get pho, and I was joking about his sister getting kidnapped because she's on a trip to China.

Him: Oh! Speaking of kidnapping, did you hear about the kidnapping at Forest Hill?

Me: No?! When did that happen?!

Him: It's okay, he woke up.

He kept chuckling pridefully to himself that he came up with that joke for a good ten mintutes.

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👤︎ u/The_Infragilis

📅︎ Jun 14 2014

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A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel down his pants. The bartender says "sir, are you aware you have a steering wheel down your pants?"

The pirate says "Aye, it be drivin me nuts"

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👤︎ u/Nasicournus

📅︎ Sep 25 2018

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