Arsenal F.C was on fire the other night

Some blame it on Cole, but I believe it was Arsene.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/eormada
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 24 2020
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My friend insulted my puns. I responded with a showcase of my arsenal. I am pundeniable.
๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Russian_Moose
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 30 2019
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What is the most relaxing weapon in a NINJA's arsenal?

The SAI of relief

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/RCRadioCarbon
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 20 2019
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What do you call an obnoxious weapon? A pain in the arsenal.
๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/FoxTrotPlays
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 05 2018
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[Meta] What jokes should be in every dad's arsenal?
๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/shadowthunder
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 22 2015
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My dad's arsenal of DadJokes.

If someone asks him if he is alright:

"No, I'm half left too!"


At a restaurant:

Server: "Hi, My name is Julie, I'll be taking care of you today"

Dad: "Hi, My name is Cane-Dewey's Dad, I'll be sitting here today"


Someone asks him: "How are you?"

Dad: "If I was any better, I'd be twins!"


And that's about it. That's his arsenal. I've heard these a million times at this point, and they are just now starting to get funny.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 18
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Cane-Dewey
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 17 2014
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REQUEST: Dads, Lend me your strength!

What are your best dad jokes for the maternity visit? The baby is days away and I need an arsenal for these here finger guns (โ˜ž๏พŸใƒฎ๏พŸ)โ˜ž

๐Ÿ‘︎ 12
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Jeromaroo
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 07 2020
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I won the lottery and squandered most of it on buying 17th century artwork and musical instruments.

It left me baroque.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Rav4xle
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 25 2020
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I got a reversible jacket for Christmas,

can't wait to see how it turns out.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 47
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/RedditUserGary
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 11 2018
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You guys got any more jokes like henway and updog?

Told like this:

Dad: Oh my god, there's a henway on your back!

Son: What's a henway?

D: About 5 pounds


D: Man, it smells like updog in here.

S: What's updog?

D: Not much, what's up with you?


My 6 year old brother has quit falling for these and I need some new ones in my arsenal. Help please.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 9
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Broke_stupid_lonely
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 23 2015
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Football related dad joke

Some background: There are two very good players that me and my dad were talking about our team (Arsenal) signing. These players surnames are Clyne and Shaw.

Me: Yeah, I reckon Arsenal should try to sign both of them

Dad: I'm in-Clyne-ed to agree with you.

Me: I'm 'Shaw' they would improve the team.

Mum: Sigh

๐Ÿ‘︎ 9
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Marsox33
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 26 2014
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My dad's favorite

I feel like I can subscribe to this sub considering I'm a new dad and need a good arsenal to embarrass my daughter... Anyway, here you go...

When talking about his days bowling in college... "Those cheerleaders never could do a 7-10 split."

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/coachlasso
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 27 2013
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