My spouse told me to stop making animal puns or leave..

I guess alpaca my bags then

πŸ‘οΈŽ 21
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Delgeski
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 12 2022
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My wife is kicking me out because she's fed up with my South American animal puns.

'OK,' I said, 'Alpaca my bags.'

πŸ‘οΈŽ 96
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ihasanali
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 05 2022
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My wife is leaving because she’s fed up with my South American animal puns.

I said, β€œSo you’re guanaco? OK, alpaca your bags.”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 162
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/zu-den-sternen
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 21 2021
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My wife when I won't stop making animal puns.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/turboboob
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 02 2019
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Animal punning is my favourite.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/catsaresneaky
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 15 2021
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Animal puns are life

Hey son, wanna hear an animal pun
NO.
Whale then, bee it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/FederalAccountant916
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 22 2021
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People get mad at me for always making marine animal puns.

I said, "Sorry, I don't do it on porpoise"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Subscribe_to_Sam24
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 22 2019
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Animal puns πŸ‘Œ
πŸ‘οΈŽ 702
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Venrathim823
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 25 2019
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I can't bear animal puns
πŸ‘οΈŽ 17
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Michaelphelpsisquick
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 22 2017
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Nothing like good old animal puns
πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/JAWSco
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 31 2019
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Your Best Animal Puns!!!

Let's see what you can doe...

πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PaladinNerd
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 21 2012
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Galactus and Godzilla in an animated pun that is hard to swallow youtube.com/watch?v=na5Un…
πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MRLDFX
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 21 2014
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Just wanted to share this animal pun card I made. :)
πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/csunshiney
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 14 2019
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My friend made a animal pun

It was terribull

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/sulphurbrick
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 11 2016
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Animals puns for wedding tables...

We're having a Canadian wedding with an animal theme to differentiate the different tables. On each table we'll have an animal emblem with some kind of love pun for each animal. It's been a trying affair to come up with these, but I know a lot of them could be better. In fact, most of them are downright ridiculous.

Reddit, how can we improve these?

Moose - I find you amoosing.

Beaver - I think I'll pick this flower for her, it would beavery romantic.

Owl - Owl always love you.

Fox - You are the object of my affoxtion.

Skunk - I stink you're sweet!

Bunny - Everybunny loves you!

Woodpecker - Knock Knock! Who's there? Wood! Wood who? Wood you be mine?

Porcupuine. I'm stuck on you.

Wolf - Wolf you marry me?

Trout - We'll be together trout eternity!

Turtle - You're turtley amazing.

Lynx - Let us lynx our lives together.

Bear - To be away from you is unbearable.

Squirrel - I'm going nuts for you!

Raven - Can't stop raven about you.

Turkey - I could just gobble you up!

Caribou - Where does one find a wedding ring for his deer? Why at the cariboutique, of course.

Deer - I love you deerly!

Goose - You give me goose bumps.

Sasquatch - Getting you to marry me was no small feat.

Also looking for some ideas for racoon, snake, and groundhogs.

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πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TonyMcConkey
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 06 2014
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Animal Puns?

Toucan play that game

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/pats5lyfe
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 01 2016
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Yes a animal pun.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 64
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Msusparten130
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 23 2012
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Great Animal Puns and Pun Pics puntenialtimes.com/animal…
πŸ‘οΈŽ 42
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/punwriter
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 30 2013
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Fish Puns

Within animal puns, we provide you the funniest bundle of fish puns

What did the fish say when he posted bail? β€œI’m off the hook!”


Why don’t fish like basketball? Cause they’re afraid of the net


Which fish can perform operations? A Sturgeon!


What do you call a fish with a tie? soFISHticated


What do you get when you cross a banker with a fish? A Loan shark!


How do you make an Octopus laugh? With ten-tickles


Why did the vegan go deep-sea fishing? Just for the halibut!


Why don’t fish play basketball? Because there afraid of the net.


What do sea monsters eat? Fish and ships.


What do you call a fish that needs help with his or her vocals? Autotuna


Who do fish always know how much they weigh? Because they have their own scales.


What is the difference between a piano and a fish? You can tune a piano but you cannot tuna fish.


Why did Sally go to the Lake after her brothers teased her? To fish for compliments.


What did the blind man say when he passed the fish market? Good morning ladies.


What did the salmon say when he swam into a wall? Damn!


Whats the best way to catch a fish? Have some one thow it at you.


How do you make a fish laugh? Tell a whale of a tale.


What happens when you drink like a fish? You piss like a fire hose.


Did you know the Octopus is the only fish that can squirt ink? Just Squidding.


What does the pope eat during lent? Holy mackerel!


What did the fish say when he posted bail? β€œI’m off the hook!”


Why don’t fish like basketball? Cause they’re afraid of the net


Which fish can perform operations? A Sturgeon!


What do you get when you cross a banker with a fish? A Loan shark!


How do you make an Octupus laugh? With ten-tickles


Why did the vegan go deep-sea fishing? Just for the halibut!


Why don’t fish play basketball? Because there afraid of the net.


What do sea monsters eat? Fish and ships.


What do you call a fish that needs help with his or her vocals? Autotuna


Who do fish always know how much they weigh? Because they have their own scales.


What is the difference between a piano and a fish? You can tune a piano but you cannot tuna fish.


Why did Sally go to the Lake after her brothers

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Punsville
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 30 2017
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Cow Puns

From animal puns, we bring for you this funniest bundle of cow puns

How does a cow get to the mooooon? It flies through udder space!


What happens when you talk to a cow? It goes in one ear and out the udder!


What do you call cattle with a sense of humor? Laughing stock.


What is a cows favorite colour? Maroooooooon.


Why did the blonde buy a brown cow? To get chocolate milk.


What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer


What do you get when you cross an elephant with a dairy cow? Peanut butter.


What do u call a really strong cow? Beefy.


What do you get when you walk under a cow? A pat on the head.


How does lady gaga like her steak? Raw raw raw raw raw.


Why did the cow cross the road? Cause it didnt want Lady Gaga to make a meat dress out of him.


What are a cows favorite subjects in school? Moosic, psycowolgy, cowculus


What do you get when you cross a cow and a duck? Milk and Quackers!


What do you call it when a cow jumps over a barbed wire fence? Udder-Catastrophe


Where do you find the most cows? Moo-York


What do cows get when they are sick? Hay Fever


Why did the moron give the sleepy cow a hammer? He wanted her to hit the hay!


Why do cows think cooks are mean? They whip cream!


Why doesn’t Sweden export it’s cattle? It wants to keep it’s Stockholm!


What is the definition of β€œmoon”? The past tense of β€œmoo”!


Why was he woman arrested on a cattle ranch for wearing a silk dress? She was charged with rustling!


Why was the calf afraid? He was a cow-herd!


Why wouldn’t anyone play with the little longhorn? He was too much of a bully!


What magazine makes cows stampede to the newsstand? Cows-mopolitan!


What’s the best way to make a bull sweat ? Put him in a tight jumper !


What South American dance do cows like to do? The Rump-a


What does a cow make when the sun comes out? A shadow


What do you get when a cow goes to the Beach with tanning oil? Pre-tanned leather.


What sound do you hear when you drop a bomb on a cow? Cowboom!


What did the calf say to the silo? β€œIs my fodder in there?”


What would you hear at a cow concert? Moo-sic!


Why did the cow jump over the moon? To get to the Milky Way!


What’s a cow’s favorite moosi

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Punsville
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 29 2017
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Which Species Of Animal Is Going To Suffer Eternal Torment In The Afterlife?

Beavers. They're all dammed.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 315
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kabalabonga
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 27 2022
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farm animals
πŸ‘οΈŽ 581
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/myverypunnydad
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 15 2022
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Mate called the Animal Welfare today and said, "I've just found a suitcase in the woods containing four kittens."

"That's terrible," she replied, "Are they moving?"

"I'm not sure, to be honest" mate said, "But if they were that would explain the suitcase"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/StephenGTS125
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 06 2022
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What is the largest and heaviest animal on land?

A beached whale.

Don’t know if this has been posted before, but it got a groan from my MIL.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 17
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Aggressive-Body-3221
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 26 2022
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What do you get when you cross a Texas animal with a sex toy

An armadildo..

πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TheDiabeticTreeLives
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 03 2022
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I showed a video of a sheep giving birth to my daughter's 2nd grade science class and asked if they knew what animal it was.

They all said, β€œEwwww.”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MrSteveA
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 27 2022
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By legalizing Cannabis and same-sex marriage we finally interpreted the bible correctly

"A man who lays with another man should be stoned"Edit : Thanks for the silver kind strangers

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/cockneybastard
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 27 2022
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Who is the biggest prostitute among animals?

The whorse.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 94
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Ok-Impress-2222
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 15 2022
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What is the greatest animal of all time?

The GOAT

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/negative_prime
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 28 2022
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I went to the zoo today, and the only animal they had was a small dog in a cage.

It was a shih tzu.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 20
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/nastyfriday
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 31 2022
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This year Comic-Con and Anime-Con are being held together.

It will be quite the confusion

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PerCentaur
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 25 2022
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The zoo was turned into a university for the animals. Which was the brainiest part?

The hippo campus

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/parklife980
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 03 2022
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Why do toddlers act like animals?

Because they’re only a little human.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 72
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/batmanstuff
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 19 2022
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A guy goes to a zoo, but the only animal in the entire zoo is a dog

It's a Shitzu

Ps. Just heard this one on a tv-show, was lol

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/WhatDutchGuy
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 22 2022
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What do you call a jungle animal that can’t keep a beat?

A deaf leopard.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 27
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ilipac
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 28 2022
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How does a farmer count all his animals in the barn?

With a cowculator!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/barleyfruit
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 29 2022
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I’d tell a joke about raising animals for food but…

I would slaughter it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/rszim94
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 15 2022
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Scientists should stop analysing animal intelligence....

....and start studying human stupidity.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 29 2022
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What animal accidently got invited to a mafia meeting?

A donkey

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Nalurah
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 30 2022
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I don't believe in NFTs, but I inherited an NFT of an animation of a horse swimming in wine.

Oh well, never look a GIF horse in vermouth.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kwan_e
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 24 2022
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Pigs are the greediest animal

They hog up everything you give them

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SatisfactoryGrape
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 07 2022
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I went to the zoo yesterday, excited to see a wide variety of exotic animals, but all they had was one dog.

It was a shih tzu.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SirSperoTamencras
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 22 2022
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I tried to tell a joke about farm animals…

But I butchered it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 33
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/rszim94
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 27 2022
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My wife is kicking me out because she's fed up with my South American animal puns

"OK", I said, "Alpaca my bags".

πŸ‘οΈŽ 21
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/professorf
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 01 2021
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My wife is kicking me out because she's fed up with my South American animal puns...

'OK,' I said, 'Alpaca my bags.'

πŸ‘οΈŽ 76
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/the_houser
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 08 2020
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Guy walks into a zoo. The only animal in the zoo is a dog

It's a shih tzu

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/hail_reefer
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 26 2022
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I went to the zoo today and they only had one animal

Just a dog in a cage. It was a Shih tzu

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/OwenJthomas89
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 12 2022
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