"Shockingly, no matter how many times the experience cycles, it still always Hertz."
Now I'm full of energy!
The first one was probably justified, the the second one was just re-volting.
Because it hertz.
Does a bear scat in the woods?
(Zee-ba-da-zap-dooey)
I always tell her the awesome jokes that I find here and other places. She rolls her eyes ninety percent of the time, as one would expect.
Well the other day I was going up an escalator and got zapped by static electricity-
Me: Ouch!
Her: Aww, it must be because you're such an electri-cutie
I was so proud, it nearly brought a tear to my eye.
Gave her a kiss and our lips got zapped from static. "I guess there's still sparks between us"
Que groan....
And from the office we hear my dad say, "ZAP! You're a hamburger."
Some precursor- I'm 27, my girlfriend is 34; we visited my family who lives in another state this past weekend for easter. The last two days I started to write down every horrible attempt at a joke my dad did. So these were just the best of the last two days. Note that this was the first time my girlfriend had met them.
When watching a commercial on liposuction, "I was going to get liposuction but they just melt it out, I wanted them to ZAP it out"
When getting directions, "Should I use my Gsp? (I think it was a joke trying to comment on the similar sound between esp and gps... not sure though)
When a commercial kept repeating "we can", he said (to the tune of ice cream ice cream we all scream for...)"WE CAN! WE CAN! WE ALL SCREAM FOR... ... DEATHcam" (I think he realized he had no joke there so sort of trailed off)
Finally, the worst. When we're pulling up to a state park, he's reading the signs that warn about rattlesnakes and scorpions. He leans in and says, "Hey, I've got a great survival tip" with a serious stern face, "Don't feed the rattlesnakes". Then cracks up with a silly laugh as if it's the funniest joke ever created. He realized that no one was laughing, so he thought if he repeated it a few times, it might get funnier. He continued throwing that joke out every time we got to a sign that had wildlife warnings. Seeing this strategy was failing to illicit any laughs, he decided to go with a new approach. He started saying "Don't feed the scorpions,"
