My favorite sound is the smoke detector...
βcause thatβs how I know supper is almost ready.
π︎ 8
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︎ Jan 05 2021
What are you if you smoke marijuana and masturbate at the same time?
π︎ 40
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︎ Nov 19 2020
I saw a guy walk into a store and buy 5 smoke machines, so I called the cops.
He must be in some extreme mist group.
π︎ 134
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︎ Dec 15 2020
A sketchy looking guy rented six smoke machines from my shop, so I called the cops.
He must be part of some extreme mist group.
π︎ 605
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︎ Sep 15 2020
What does Perry the Platypus smoke?
π︎ 2
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︎ Oct 16 2020
The female janitor in my building asked if I would smoke some weed with her.
I said no; I can't deal with high maintenance women.
π︎ 154
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︎ Jun 30 2020
We know the effects of second hand smoke are terrible.
Does anyone have peer reviewed studies on the effects of minute hand smoke?
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︎ Aug 13 2020
Why is there a wolf in the smoke shop?
He's just looking for a pack.
π︎ 13
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︎ Jun 06 2020
Did you hear that the guy who got second place in that smoke machine design contest forgot how his prototype worked?
When they asked him about it, he said he didnβt have the foggiest idea.
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︎ May 23 2020
What do the French smoke to get high?
π︎ 112
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︎ Nov 25 2019
I want to drink my coffee, smoke my cigarette, browse reddit on my phone all at the same time but I only have 2 hands. I wish I had another set of hands for this.
I think that would be pretty handy.
π︎ 5
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︎ Feb 13 2020
My cocky jockey friend likes to brag about how he gets to smoke weed while on the job.
I told him to get off his high horse.
π︎ 22
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︎ Feb 05 2020
What Tobacco Product Did the Ancient Mesopotamians Smoke?
π︎ 3
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︎ Dec 07 2019
The French donβt smoke weed.
π︎ 7
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︎ Jan 12 2019
I went to the doctor for my bad back. he told me to smoke weed
I have a chronic back problem
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︎ Jul 29 2019
The apple asked the Pear: Do you want to Smoke this fruit? Come on youβll love it!
The pear responded: I will never succumb to your Pear-Pressure.
π︎ 4
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︎ Jun 27 2019
The janitor in my apartment building asked whether I would hang out with her and smoke pot. I said no.
I canβt deal with a high maintenance woman.
π︎ 164
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︎ Jul 30 2018
I always smoke some weed before showing up at the airport
π︎ 2
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︎ Mar 22 2019
What did the smoker say when he ran out of smokes and found a cigarette pack?
π︎ 3
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︎ Feb 07 2019
What did the apple smoke a cigarette?
Because of pear pressure.
π︎ 21
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︎ Oct 28 2016
Camping tip: If smoke follows beauty, and beauty is in the eye of the beholder...
... then smoke is always in your eye.
π︎ 2
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︎ Jan 03 2019
I tried to smoke some fish the other day
I couldnβt get them lit
π︎ 5
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︎ Nov 17 2018
My dad said he used to smoke marijuana in the 60s
but now he smokes at any temperature.
π︎ 24
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︎ Jan 19 2018
I'm so mad that I've got severe burns this morning because the smoke detectors didn't work.
π︎ 4
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︎ Jun 19 2018
I used to smoke pot in the 60's...
Now I don't care what the temperature outside is.
π︎ 15
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︎ Jan 24 2018
What is it called when you smoke weed on the beach with an Asian dude?
π︎ 12
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︎ Oct 08 2016
The experts said my smoke alarms were too old...
..but they still work just fine. I think they are just being alarmists.
π︎ 10
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︎ Oct 19 2017
Why The Wise Man Smoke?
π︎ 13
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︎ Feb 10 2014
My dads response when I asked him if we could smoke the turkey...
π︎ 18
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︎ Nov 29 2013
Don't smoke and chew Wrigley's at the same time.
π︎ 2
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︎ Apr 21 2015
The janitor lady just asked me to smoke some weed with her
I turned her down I don't like high maintenance women
π︎ 1k
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︎ Nov 16 2019
A sketchy guy just came into my shop and bought six smoke machines. So I called the cops.
He must be a part of some extreme mist group.
π︎ 7k
π
︎ Nov 03 2018
A sketchy guy came into my store and bought six smoke machines. So I called the cops.
He must be part of some extreme mist group.
π︎ 52
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︎ Sep 29 2019
A sketchy guy just came to my shop and bought 12 smoke machines so I called the cops....
I thought he could be part of some extreme mist group
π︎ 9
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︎ Sep 20 2019
A sketchy guy just came into my shop and bought six smoke machines. So I called the cops.
He must be a part of some extreme mist group.
π︎ 11
π
︎ Jun 10 2019
A sketchy guy just came into my shop and bought six smoke machines, so I called the cops...
I think he must be a part of some extreme mist group...
π︎ 12
π
︎ Nov 10 2018
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