My favorite sound is the smoke detector...

β€˜cause that’s how I know supper is almost ready.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2021
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I'm so mad that I've got severe burns this morning because the smoke detectors didn't work.

I'm still fuming!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CFDMoFo
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2018
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My wife asked if she could have a little peace and quiet while she cooked dinner.

So I took the battery out of the smoke detector.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/crazyfortaco
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2020
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My baby-momma said she wanted to cook dinner in some peace and quiet...

...so I took the batteries out of the smoke detector.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BassWizard420
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2019
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The wife is pissed at me...

because I failed to change the 9 volt battery in the smoke detector in her office. She came in afew minutes later looking for sympathy when the battery hit her square in the forehead when attempting to change it herself. Instead of offering sympathy, though, I said, "Well, there's a reason it's called a battery." And now I'll be sleeping in the guestroom.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RickShaw530
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2015
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