A woman is on trial for beating her significant other with a guitar. “First offender?” the judge asked.
“No” she replied. “First a Gibson , then a Fender”
What kind of cheese is really good at guitar?
After playing guitar for years I thought I could learn to play the piano.
But it's not an easy instrument to pick up.
Did you hear about the crook who was stealing guitars from classic rock stars?
He was just arrested for Petty theft.
What is the difference between a guitar , a Tuna and a pot of glue?
You can tun(a) guitar but cannot guitar a tuna
Egyptians claimed to have invented the guitar,
But they were such lyres.
A bloke came up to me and said im going to attack you with the neck of my guitar.
I said to him is that a Fret!
What did Prince leave on the neck of his guitar?
What happened when the guitars got in a fight?
Why can't guitars have fun with friends with benefits?
Because without strings attached they just can't play!
Just got lowballed. $5 for my guitar. Best way to respond?
What did the upright bass say to the nervous guitar?
“You’re too high strung, don’t fret.”
My friend used to clean house for a famous singer-guitar player, til he died in 2016. She then became a police investigator...
She dusted for Prince now she's dusting for prints.
the fisherman was playing his out of tune guitar
I just broke my guitar...
What do you call a guitar used to play pool?
I tried to play a bass guitar once.
It didn't make much sound, and it slipped out of my hands and swam away
What chord does jesus play on guitar?
My guitar neck got nervous
Why can't Woody play his guitar?
He doesn't know where his Pixar.
My priest fired me from playing guitar with the choir.
Apparently it’s blasphemous to play a Gsus2 chord.
I want to post a Tik Tok video of me playing my guitar but...
... I'd probably be band.
What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?
You can tune a guitar but you can't "tuna" fish!
Why did the guitar teacher get arrested?
Because he fingered A Minor
I lost my guitar pick made out of cow bone
I told my brother I lost my bone pick, he said “of course you did”
“I really have a bone to pick with myself for doing that”
What do you call a distilled botanical that likes to play the guitar??
I really like guitars
They just strike a chord with me
Ringo, John snd George walked into an electric guitar shop...
When I was younger I wanted to play guitar really badly.
And after lots of hard work and practice, I now play the guitar really badly.
I was whipping up some pesto when I realized I was out of an herb to add flavor. Luckily, my son's guitar was handy....
I was able to add some bass-il to my tasty sauce.
What’s the difference between a fish, guitar, and a pot of glue?
“You can tune a guitar but you can’t tune a fish”
“What about the pot of glue”
“I knew you’d get stuck on that”
A woman was on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection
the judge says: "First offender" The woman replies: "No, first a Gibson, the a Fender"
A woman is on trial for beating up a unfaithful rockstar husband with his guitar collection
The judge asked her, “first offender”
“No,” she says “first a Gibson then a Fender
After playing guitar for years I thought I could learn to play the piano.
But it's not an easy instrument to pick up.
Some guy just said he was going to attack me with the neck of a guitar.
I said, “Is that a fret?”
Some guy just threatened to attack me with a neck of a guitar.
What's the difference between a guitar, a fish, and glue?
You can tune a guitar, but you can't tuna fish!
Guitar
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection.
The judge asks her, "First offender?"
She replies, "No, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!"
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