What do you call a superpower that lets you locate french pastries with your mind?

Γ‰clairvoyance

πŸ‘οΈŽ 25
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/_stevel
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 06 2020
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I was asked if I could have any superpower in the world what would it be?

I answered Cold war russia

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Jaku2201
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 19 2020
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Now that the USA is no longer the pre-eminent superpower of the world, what's next?

USB

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SFLoridan
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 03 2020
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What a shitty superpower...
πŸ‘οΈŽ 33
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RhinoVanHorn
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 06 2020
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I just learned that I've got superpowers yesterday

Today i will make you read

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Slymood
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 14 2020
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My superpower, _________, far exceeds your abilities /r/AskOuija/comments/fylm…
πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Pair-Controller-404
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 11 2020
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I say my secret superpower is detecting Indian flatbread in any given room.

My friends all say it's naan-sense.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 162
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/woodybuzzes
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 22 2019
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So I was asking my brother how come he only uses his superpowers on my daughters

He said it’s because he only has telekinesis not telekinephews

πŸ‘οΈŽ 311
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CaptainHalfrica
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 04 2019
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I have a superpower...

I can hear at the speed of sound.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Samyie
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 27 2020
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If I could have any superpower, I would choose invisibility. But I wouldn't use it to do anything ILLEGAL...

Just to be clear.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 50
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/aphaelion
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 04 2019
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A friend of mine once told me that the best superpower would be the ability to detect the presence of Indian bread.

I said β€œThat’s naan-sense!”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 70
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ToroZuzuX
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 18 2019
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What superpower did the celery want?

Cele-kinesis

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ThePunZoo
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 01 2019
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My son asked me what superpower I wanted

I guess Russia wasn't the answer

πŸ‘οΈŽ 18
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/dr-phil-swift
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 26 2019
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The Germans were a superpower during WW II....

The World did Nazi this coming.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Godzilla_KOM
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 11 2019
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The worst superpower
πŸ‘οΈŽ 37
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/seahat
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 04 2017
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My 7yo son asked "if you could have superpowers, what would you pick?"

I told him "I'd choose the soup."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 25
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Thedaveabides98
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 02 2017
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My kid dadjoked me: β€œDad, I wish I had a superpower where I could create anything I imagine”

Me: Like Green Lantern?

Son: Sure, I could create Green Lantern.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/vanilla_almond
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 29 2017
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Recent Trip to the Grocery Store

I was just in a checkout line at the grocery store and the man behind me was going on and on in broken English about being from some Neo-Mediterranean superpower. He got my attention, pointed to a newspaper above the belt, and asked what it was. I replied β€œIt’s the Times, New Roman.”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/FapAlbert
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 08 2020
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I hate it when people ask me,”what do you think the future is going to be like?”

I don’t have 2020 vision

πŸ‘οΈŽ 20
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/W4ffleZ
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 22 2019
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I wish I could photosynthesize occasionally

If only for a light snack

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/KillingTime6
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 30 2019
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When you are unhappy with life, look at the bright side.

Maybe your superpower is to expect too much.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 14 2017
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Son: "Dad, all I touch turns to shit."

Dad: spits out sandwich

"Is it a goddamn superpower or figurative, and did you make this?"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/bbgamingandcollect17
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 23 2018
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Help making a pun?

So I know this sounds ridiculous but I really need help with a pun.

Imagine a superhero. Punman Obviously the superpower here is to be able to make puns.

What would his sidekick be named? Obviously this is a huge opportunity for a pun, but I got nothing.

Please help. Thank you haha.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/caddlaxx
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 06 2015
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Recent Trip to the Grocery Store

I was just in a checkout line at the grocery store and the man behind me was going on and on in broken English about being from some Neo-Mediterranean superpower. He got my attention, pointed to a newspaper above the belt, and asked what it was. I replied β€œIt’s the Times, New Roman.”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/FapAlbert
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 08 2020
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