I told my suitcases we werenβt going on vacation
Now Iβm dealing with emotional baggage
π︎ 228
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︎ Aug 07 2020
A guy is walking through the woods one day when he comes across a suitcase. He takes a look inside, only to find a fox and her cubs. So he calls the ASPCA and tells the woman who answers what heβs found...
She says, βOh, thatβs horrible. Are they moving?β
The guy replies, βI donβt know, but that would explain the suitcase.β
π︎ 441
π
︎ Jun 30 2020
What did the lawyer say when he put is suitcase to bed?
π︎ 3
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︎ Jun 18 2020
I made the mistake of telling my suitcase that we wonβt be going anywhere this year because of the pandemic.
Iβm having to put up with a lot of emotional baggage ever since.
π︎ 21
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︎ May 07 2020
Why did the astrophysicist put photons in a suitcase?
He was trying to pack light.
π︎ 7
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︎ Jun 04 2020
I just told my suitcase that there will be no vacation this year, it sucks!
Emotional baggage is the worst!
π︎ 18
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︎ May 09 2020
Why didn't the photon pack a suitcase?
π︎ 14
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︎ Mar 07 2020
Told my suitcase we could not go on vacation this year
As I'm looking at my empty suitcase I thought it looked sad...
Then I thought "great... Now I have emotional baggage!"
π︎ 5
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︎ May 10 2020
I sent my son next door with a packed suitcase. They called asking why.
I said He is a Home School Foreign Exchange Student.
π︎ 7
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︎ Apr 16 2020
I just LOAF that suitcase, and i KNEAD one now...
π︎ 106
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︎ Oct 04 2019
I asked my wife to pack my stuff in a suitcase for business trip. But she packed in my backpack instead
She said it's the same and easier. Well yes but that's not the case
π︎ 4
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︎ Oct 15 2019
As a single Dad, I tried flirting with the check-in girl at the airport while loading my kids' suitcases.
But she just kept saying I had too much baggage.
π︎ 156
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︎ Nov 09 2018
My father and I were leaving our hotel room in Iraq and he almost forgot his suitcase. I said, "Don't forget your Baghdad."
π︎ 65
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︎ Dec 23 2018
My magician friend is really excited about his new trick, where he tries to pack himself into a small suitcase.
He can hardly contain himself.
π︎ 24
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︎ May 02 2019
My son asked me to open his suitcase, so I broke it open
π︎ 2
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︎ May 25 2019
My wife flew back from a family visit and arrived with many suitcases
Thereβs a lot to unpack here
π︎ 5
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︎ May 07 2019
I fell over a suitcase at the airport the other day
π︎ 6
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︎ Feb 24 2019
What did the 70s rock singer say when his son asked whether their suitcase was a carry on or a checked bag?
π︎ 4
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︎ Apr 02 2019
Dad called the Police today and said, "I've just found a suitcase in the woods containing a fox and four cubs..."
"That's terrible," the woman dispatcher on the phone replied.
"Are they moving?"
"I'm not sure, to be honest," Dad said, "But that would explain the suitcase."
π︎ 444
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︎ Dec 29 2016
So i was at an airport and someone put a suitcase next too mine that was identical
I picked it up thinking it was mine, but that was not the case
π︎ 5
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︎ Oct 16 2018
The Sun has such a small suitcase!
Apparently it's to travel light.
π︎ 5
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︎ Sep 07 2016
π︎ 257
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︎ Jul 12 2013
Why couldn't the steward move the suitcase?
π︎ 3
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︎ Mar 04 2017
While packing a suitcase
"And I'll need a few shirts."
"You'll only need two shirts max."
"But I'm not Max, I'm Tom!"
π︎ 3
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︎ May 13 2014
I made the mistake of telling my suitcase that we wonβt be going away this year because of the pandemic...
Iβm having to deal with a lot of emotional baggage.
π︎ 25
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︎ May 21 2020
My father and I were leaving our hotel room in Iraq and he almost forgot his suitcase
I said "Don't forget your Baghdad"
π︎ 122
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︎ Sep 28 2018
My father and i were leaving an hotel in iraq and he almost forgot his suitcase... so i told him
Don't forget your Baghdad
π︎ 12
π
︎ Sep 30 2018
My father and I were leaving our hotel in Iraq and he almost forgot his suitcase.
I said βdonβt forget your Baghdadβ
π︎ 13
π
︎ Sep 30 2018
Why didnβt the photon bring itβs suitcase?
Because it was traveling light!
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jun 13 2018
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