Amen
D: Are you?
Patient: physically shaking
D: I see.
you have a problem with me.
And I was like "Yahweh"
But it's just not cutting it.
Me: "Hmm, I wish I could pull off her short hair, I never could"
Him: "Aw, I'm sure you could. I'll hold her down while you yank it out"
Didn't see that coming.
Edit: thanks guys I didn't realise fiance/e has genders.
Because they were looking for pi.
Ok I know this is bad but shut up
He planned to do some yard work and was looking for gloves. He sounded frustrated, and I asked him what was wrong. He said "I have three right gloves. What does that tell you?"
Me: That there's nothing left?
Her response: Even. But they smell odd.
Is the word 'Lung membrane' singular or pleural?
The sphagetto. (A singular strand of sphagetti is called a sphagetto)
...and soon grew and sold thousands to florists around the world. He called the flowers Nomasia, both singular and plural. Soon, almost every field and house had Nomasia.
One day a man was found dead with Nomasia in his hand and a joke written on his shirt. A detective arrived at the scene and instantly saw the pun on the dead man's clothes. "What's that?" he asked an officer nearby. The officer answered, "Oh, that's just a pair o' Nomasia."
While prepping some pork for tomorrow's dinner, my dad dropped this beauty.
"I'm going to contact the 'Nade' family and ask them if they have ever named one of their daughters 'Mary'."
It's the dad joke singularity of facepalm concept and horrendous execution.
