Looking for shark puns! Hoping I could get some help here.
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2015
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My roomba went out my front door and a pack of bears attacked it, an eagle carried it away to the ocean, and a shark finished it off.

Nature abhors a vacuum.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dingogordy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2021
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A shark can swim faster than me, but I reckon I can run faster than a shark.

So, if it was a Triathlon, it would come down to, which one of us was better at riding a bike....Right!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
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Who delivers presents to baby sharks at Christmas?

Santa Jaws

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hirsty19784
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
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Why did the shark eat the ship?

...It wanted captain crunch for breakfast.

My 12 year old daughter hit me with this one this morning.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fyrefrog25
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2020
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What did the seal with a broken arm say to the shark?

"Do not consume if seal is broken."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/djkress
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
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One Shark bucks latte please
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dogzsquadarts
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2020
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A man is walking down the street when he looks into an alley and sees 2 sharks standing up.

One shark hands the other one a small packet full of some suspicious white powder.

"That's some fishy business" the man remarks.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ParadoxXSchock
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2020
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A hammerhead shark made from hammer heads
πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Vermillion_-_
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2020
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Was watching a shark movie, when suddenly it ended unexpectedly

β€˜Fin’

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2020
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Why do sharks live in saltwater?

Because pepperwater makes them sneeze.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2020
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What do sharks eat for lunch?

Fish and ships.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2020
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Pretend you are on a raft in the middle of the ocean surrounded by sharks. You only have a one day supply of water and a harpoon. What do you do?

Stop pretending.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/youthfulcomrade
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2020
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There are no difference for sharks in Japan.

They are all the さめ

*さ=sa, め=me, さめ = same =shark.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/aaron_ariff
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
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What do you call a horse swimming in shark infested waters?

Sea Biscuit

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πŸ‘€︎ u/clark_creationz
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
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Why do sharks swim in salt water?

Because pepper water makes them sneeze

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ardensulled
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
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What do you call a sad shark?

A woebegone Wobbegong.

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2020
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What shark doesn't have any friends?

A loan shark

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pollrobots
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2020
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What do you call a hoard of a million Latin-speaking gigantic sharks?

MegaLodon.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/vs424reddit
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2020
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Heard a guy swimming yelling β€œHELP, SHARK, HELP!!!”

And i just kept laughing because i knew that shark wasn’t going to help

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shitz-and-gigglez
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2020
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What’s a shark’s favorite meal?

Fish & Ships

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Daily_Vinyl
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2020
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A shark tried eating a boat but he didn’t like it

Didn’t have enough vitamin sea

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πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2020
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🦈 Shark 🦈!!
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Puppyismycat
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2020
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Shark: Once, I had a tough fight with an octopus.

He was well-armed.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/khAngnghiEmm
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25 2020
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How do sharks share memes?

On the finternet.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ceruleanlunacy
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2020
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My family ate thresher shark for the first time yesterday. My dad took a bite and said

Look at me!!! A man eating shark!!!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/roscoe9420
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2020
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What do you get when you cross a cow with a shark?

I don’t know but I wouldn’t wanna milk it

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πŸ‘€︎ u/carlazuzcnn10
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2020
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When a guy I know meets people, he says he likes to treat them to shark fishing on his boat...

He says he's gotten a lot of chums that way.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2020
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There is a higher chance of being struck by lightning than to be killed in a shark attack.

Shocking isn't it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/crackshot666
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2020
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Looking for a female shark name pun

I have this weird superhero school project thing. I have the male sharks name (Finnley), but I'm struggling to think of one for a female shark.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jesusmusk
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2019
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ViCiOuS ShArK EaTs PoOr PuPpY
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πŸ‘€︎ u/glitchomojo
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2019
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What did the shark say before getting married?

Yes I do, do do do do do do!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ready373
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2020
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What do you call the soft tissue between a shark’s teeth?

The slowest swimmer.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Arkham_Asylum27
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2020
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Channel Shark News

I wrote a little skit for my grandkids let's see how much I remember. CHUM 8 news Ted Hammerhead reporting with sky Chompter traffic report. Top story, a lone shark, who is a loan shark is alone in the dark making loans to sharks! There is a new place to gamble, the place is full of sharks who turn out to be card sharks playing card games with sharks on the cards. Imagune the dogs playing poker for this story, but it's sharks. The other reporter asks Ted Hammerhead how he did on his recent drivers test, Ted responds "nailed it". Crime scene where a clown has been killed and the Detective states, " No way a shark did this as they taste funny". On a comment about the victim. I never did the weather or figured out names for the other reporters we used to laugh and laugh at my stupid puns.

Edit: I can't spell fixed typos

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Phroedrick
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2020
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A hammerhead shark
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Grindingslimes
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2019
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My jackass husband just hit me with this one. Pretend you are on a boat surrounded by sharks. How do you survive?

You stop pretending.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thehornyghost
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2019
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Why do kids like β€œBaby Shark” so much?

They just do do do do do do do.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Doctor_Nutsack
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2019
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a HAMMERhead shark!
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πŸ‘€︎ u/equishh
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2019
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The Hammerhead Hammerhead Shark
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zach5585
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2019
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Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight?

Because it was well armed.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
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Poor Shark has a Loose Canine
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nirenyderp
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2019
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If fishing for a shark is called shark fishing, what do you call fishing for a whale?

Whale mammaling...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MadFluffyScience
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2019
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What’s a shark favorite game?

Swallow the leader

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jothebest75
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2020
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Why don't sharks eat clowns?

They taste funny

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MetalBeastt
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2020
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A BEAUTIFUL HAMMERHEAD SHARK
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πŸ‘€︎ u/drewthepooh72
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2019
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Why do sharks swim in salt water?

Because they would sneeze in pepper water!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sleepypanda59
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2020
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Why do sharks live in saltwater?

Because pepper makes them sneeze

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BlankPhotos
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2020
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Why do sharks swim in saltwater?

Because pepperwater makes 'em sneeze.

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2020
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