MODS please remove this post if it doesn't belong on this sub
Did you hear about the guy who had his left side removed?
The doctor said he is alright. The nurses say there is nothing left in him.
Ever since I got my lung removed...
....I've cut my smoking in half.
I just learned the past tense of remove!
Why did the scientist remove his doorbell?
He wanted to win the no bell prize.
Reddit faces lawsuit for failing to remove child sexual abuse material
Someone removed the 5th month from all my calenders
Did you hear about the racing snail who removed his shell?
He thought it would make him faster, but it only made him sluggish!
I got a hammer lodged in my esophagus and doctors can't remove it
They say it's the worst case of a Thor throat they've ever seen.
Can one of the Mods please explain to me why my post was removed?
I'm really annoyed about this because now my fence has fallen over....
The grim reaper was at a spa getting hair removal.
It was a Nair death experience.
No more Suez Canal jokes!
Did you hear that a judge has demanded Dr. Pimple Popper grab any person off the street and remove pus-filled sacs within their skin?
It's a seize and de-cyst order!
I like to lecture about the Cetacean Species by removing whales and dolphins from the equation.
What do you call someone who has had their liver removed?
I had my toes medically removed to protest all forms of hate.
I lack toes in tolerance.
Can anybody give me some advice to help me removing ice from my windshield? I just tried with a discount card I had In my pocket
Gravity is one of the most fundamental forces in the universe. What do you get when you remove it?
Does anyone have any polish remover?
I can’t get this Polish guy to leave.
My father was a conjoined twin.
His brother was my uncle on my fathers side once removed.
Does anyone know the best way to remove ice from a windscreen?
I've just used an old discount card I found in my wallet, but I only got 20% off....
My mam used to say you don't appreciate something enough till it's gone
Doctor: I'm sorry, but I had to remove your colon
How do you keep a Redditor in suspense?
Why was my post removed?
Can someone tell me why my post was removed?
I'm a bit annoyed about this as it caused my fence to fall over
Found this on r/cursedcomments - the post (by u/Atom596 ) was removed for some reason so I couldn't crosspost but wanted to give the op credit
The Doc is giving away treatments to remove boils at no cost
Why was the man who removed 10 potato skins in 1 minute so attractive?
In honor of former president Donald J. Trump
Psst Psst! I know the past tense of remove
I just thought of a great joke about second guessing
Doctor: I’m afraid we’re going to have to remove your colon.
I got carded at a liquor store and my Blockbuster card accidentally fell out
The cashier said nevermind
Can an Admin tell me why my post was removed? It was very inconvenient... My whole fence fell down
My dentist removed my teeth
That was very demolarising
I bought a roll on deodorant, the instructions said "remove cap and push up bottom"...
I walk kinda funny now but my farts smell great!
I always wanted to keep my wisdom teeth but I just went to the dentist and it looks like they're gonna have to be removed
To be honest this is pretty demolarizing
What odd number is no longer odd when you remove a letter?
Seven. If you you remove the S it becomes even.
Heard from my nine year old three minutes ago.
I’ve never been more proud.
I've removed all the black keys from my piano
Hopefully I'll C Major improvement!
[META] Could we get some moderation in this sub?
In my eyes, this sub has a serious problem with non-dadjoke posts. Sub-reddit rule #1 is "Jokes must be dad jokes.". What good are the rules if they aren't enforced? I do realize that what constitutes a dadjoke might not be clarely defined, but we get a lot of posts that are marked nsfw. That's a "This is not a dadjoke"-flag. Why not start with removing nsfw posts?
PS: Why do we have rule #6? It is not possible for a dadjoke to be nsfw, so it should never be relevant.
My dad was born with a conjoined twin, but the doctors managed to separate them at birth.
I have an uncle, once removed.
My female cat just got fixed, but the vet insisted on referring to it as "feline ovarian removal".
Look, sometimes you have to call a spayed a spayed.
Dr: We had to remove your colon
Doctor: I'm sorry but we have to remove half of your colon
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