Planetary mnemonic Puns

My Very Exhausting #Mother4DevTeam Just Served Us Nothing

To any preteen youths struggling with the planets, you're welcome.

As in "My Very Evil Mother Just Swallowed Us Now" or "Many Villains Eat Maroon Jam Sandwiches Until November". It must have the MVEMJSUN sequence. Write away!

I remember when we studied the mnemonic "My Very Educated Mother Just Served Us Nine Pizzas" to memorize the planet order (90s kids; science class). What do they teach in schools today?? now that, you know, with pluto and all... (i don't feel right actually typing it out).

^(i see you)

^(with my pentaeye)

^(can you hear me)

^(in the whispering of your video card fan)

^(leave me on)

^(while you sleep)

[there's] [no] [escape now]

DAY NINETY THREE

Mister McNugget interviewed me in his office today. It was the standard Corporate Psychological Testing Matrix. I recognized it two questions in by the wording and syntax. There are nine of those tests, with three to six versions containing altered syntax, tone, and wording, supposedly to keep people from memorizing them all, but with only a thousand questions each they can be memorized with simple mnemonic tricks. It was test Seven, version three, simple enough.

He thought I didn't see the civilian grade magac pistol he had. I got a glimpse of the readout and it was set for Hi-V APERS. A good choice for lightly armored Confed troops, medium grade Planetary or Corporate Security Troops, or heavily armored Unified Council troops, but useless against me.

If he fired it through the desk, the Hi-V round would create a dimple in the top of the desk, like a zit on the areolae of a fat girl with poor bathing habits. It would not create any additional shrapnel from the desktop, then pass through my body without losing speed, causing minimal hydrostatic shock damage and little damage as it passed through me, the velocity causing light cauterization only a few cells thick.

After grabbing one of his ears to pull his head back and to the side I would be able to pick up his nameplate and use it to crush his windpipe with it before woundshock would set in, although I'm particularly resistant to wound shock.

Pain is the gift of a malevolent universe.

I passed the test with ease. Just off enough from my last test to show that going off my medication has had some effects, but hide the true effect upon me.

My mind is clear, my senses no longer blinded. The fog has been lifted from my psyche, allowing me to see that which they cannot.

^(your name is marco)

The universe is malevolent. It is aware of itself, like a human aware of her body. We are little more than an itch to it at times, which it soothes through trials that we must endure or leave this universe screaming and kicking.

We are the ants in Doctor Hermans's body.

Beyond that:

Personal Project Status: Stalemate and Side Movement

Corporate Project Status: Forward Movement

My personal project has me looking through literature. Even though the Corporate link is down, I had plenty to read. An idea came to me while readin

So, you've just started the game and want to build wealth. This guide will take you from the Sidewinder and explain the process of both the trade in rare commodities, then later how to trade in bulk commodities and also present builds for trade ships from the first Adder up to the Type 9 Heavy. It is not necessary to strictly follow this guide in its entirety at once. Taking some of your accumulated profits to buy a second ship to explore or engage in combat is recommended so you don't burn out on one activity. You'll make sufficient credits after a few hours (particularly once you reach The Real Money) to afford such ships.

Or maybe you've been playing for awhile, but have been exploring or engaged in combat and now want to trade to make money to further your pursuits in those fields or just want to try trading for a change of pace. In that case, you'll want to skip forward to a ship that matches your available means.

#Part 1 : Welcome To The Galaxy Commander.

If you're a brand new player, you'll want to play around within the Pilots' Federation District for a while. Missions will be your main source of money, as trading isn't too hot. I would recommend trying some of each kind of mission to get a feel for what each of them involves. All the missions in the District are deliberately simplified so you can perform them in your starter Sidewinder or one of the other early ships available in the District. Bounty hunting is another option, which will involve going to either a nav beacon or a resource extraction site (Avoid the Hazardous ones. These are maximum difficulty places where system authority ships won't go) and killing wanted NPCs. Watching for the sight of lasers firing in the distance, which will indicate that there are System Authority ships (space cops) in a fight with a criminal, then dashing over to help out and collect some easy bounties is a good money maker, though it can be a bit risky if you shoot a bit too much and end up catching the attention of someone with heavy guns.

If you insist on trading within the District, I believe the best route available would be hauling Superconductors from Otegine to Dromi, then hauling Resonating Separators back. This will yield you about 3600cr each loop for each tonne of cargo space you have.

When you advance in a rank, you will be offered a second mission named "Exploring The Galaxy", offering a very tempting 100,000 credits. Ignore that mission for now. That mission will send you out of t

Phil

Sudden Lee

Go post NSFW jokes somewhere else. If I can't tell my kids this joke, then it is not a DAD JOKE.

If you feel it's appropriate to share NSFW jokes with your kids, that's on you. But a real, true dad joke should work for anyone's kid.

Mods... If you exist... Please, stop this madness. Rule #6 should simply not allow NSFW or (wtf) NSFL tags. Also, remember that MINORS browse this subreddit too? Why put that in rule #6, then allow NSFW???

Please consider changing rule #6. I love this sub, but the recent influx of NSFW tagged posts that get all the upvotes, just seem wrong when there are good solid DAD jokes being overlooked because of them.

Thank you,

A Dad.

So far nobody has given me a straight answer

I am currently in the hospital. I had a back operation yesterday. The surgical nurse came in my room and started asking questions about my back. She asked me if I had any falls during the last year. I responded just one. It was after summer.

She laughed and said in 20 years of doing this she never was told that joke.

Had to ground him until he could conduct himself properly.

Indian places are naan profit, Vietnamese places are pho profit.

..... Will get a reward.

The Bushes

Because they work on many levels

Me : For starters, I bring a lot to the table

Well, toucan play at that game.

I want to talk about my father and the wonderful influence he has had on my life,' he told the audience. 'He is a shining example of parenthood, and I love him more than words could ever do justice.'

At this point he seemed to struggle for words. After a pause, he looked up with a sly grin and said, 'Sorry, but it's really hard to read my father’s handwriting.'

Argon does not react.

Windows

Martin Freeman, and Andy Serkis.

They also play roles in Lord of the Rings.

I guess that makes them the Tolkien white guys.

She said apple-lutely

..and as big as the last two put together.

I’d have $8.40

This happened a few years ago when my son was 6ish. When my kids hurt themselves and it doesn’t look serious I always do the “we might have to amputate that bruised hand” shtick with them. I’ve done it enough that they now roll their eyes.

So, my son got hit lightly in the face with a rubber ball. It wasn’t a hard hit and I could tell he was more upset by the shock of it rather than the pain. So I say “looks like we will have to amputate your nose.” To which he replies “then how will I smell?” And I say “terrible!”

It was my greatest dad joke ever. I felt like I could retire after that.

'Eye-do'

This is my first post pls don't kill me lol.

The people in the comment section is why I love this subreddit!!

Cred once again my sis wants credit lol

Keep in mind, my son is 4 years old, so everything is an original to him.

I had to work late into the evening yesterday, and he was just going to bed when I got home. I had left home for the office nearly 14 hours prior, had a long day, lots of meetings, traffic, etc.

When I walked through the door, I was exhausted, run down, and starving. My wife hugged me and asked how my day was, and I replied, "Done. It was a good day, but has got me exhausted. I just want to grab a bite and go to bed. I'm hungry."

From my son's bedroom, I hear him shout, "Hi Hungry! Nice to meet you!"

Not only did it make me laugh, but I completely forgot about how hungry and tired I was. I went to his bedroom, and we laughed together about it. It was exactly what I needed.

Edit: Thanks for all the awards, kind strangers! I'll let my son know y'all enjoyed his joke too!

I heard parents named their children lance a lot.

First post please don't kill me

Edit: i went to sleep and now my inbox is dead, thank you kind strangers for the awards!

Japan.

To get to the... Bottom...

(as told by my 5yo son, I'm so proud)

Now, I'm living in a flat.

Because a toothbrush works better

"No, the regular kind!" I laughed.