What instrument does a fish play?
My ex used to hit me with a stringed instrument every day.
If only i had known about her history of violins.
I was thinking to myself, if I wanted to race some musical instruments, where would I go?
Then it came to me, a soundtrack of course.
What is a skeletons favourite instrument?
I won the lottery and squandered most of it on buying 17th century artwork and musical instruments.
What’s a sheep’s favorite instrument?
How much was Texas Instruments fined when they were caught offering free breast augmentation procedures to employees?
What is the name of the great actor, who also quietly plays an instrument?
A man only plays his instrument when alone
Accordion to himself, he’s great
How does a clam learn to play an instrument?
My Dad is really excited that I play the same musical instrument he does. I'm not sure if it's worth it,
since he calls me "Tuba Good In Junior"
What do you call an influencer who makes videos about brass instruments?
Accordion to a recent survey, inserting musical instruments into sentences goes largely unnoticed.
What instrument do skeletons play?
Saxophone might be considered as the sexiest musical instrument
but there is nothing sounds more horny than brass
A drumset is a very deep instrument
Who's the best at installing covers for the instrument panels in automobiles
What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?
My son claims that he identifies as an ancient Greek string instrument.
Frankly, I think he's a lyre.
What's Pythagoras' favorite instrument?
What’s a skeletons favourite instrument?
My son was surprised when the present I got my wife for Christmas wasn't an instrument
...I told him I was giving her an upright organ
What is the surgeon's favorite instrument?
A music project in the ghetto taught a lot of youngsters to play string instruments. The crime rate dropped significantly.
But now they have a lot of violins
I'm watching a video from Wintergatan where he plays a homemade instrument that works using marbles.
Accordian to a recent survey, replacing words with the names of musical instruments often goes undetected.
What is a skeleton's favorite musical instrument?
Everytime the harpist struck a C chord, it was like they were playing a different instrument..
Violins is never the answer
I dad jokes my dentist while she was actively working on me.
Scene- Me, at dentist, having teeth removed. She was having a bit of trouble with some of them and this was while she had instruments in my mouth. There's some pain after maximum amount of anesthetic she can give me. Asks me how I'm doing.
Me- There is some pain in the teeth after numbing but it isn't anything I can handle.
Dentist- Last time you were here we didn't have a problem but this time your teeth are being a major pain in the butt.
Me- My teeth are a pain in the butt? No wonder people say I talk out of my ass way too much.
She had to stop for a bit to finish laughing.
Why can't Woody play his guitar?
He doesn't know where his Pixar.
The musical saw is the most challenging instrument
They’re always a bit sharp.
What do you call a group of killer whales playing instruments?
A friend of mine is trying to find the definition of a percussion instrument.
I told him "Beats me; I have no idea."
What do you call a woodwind instrument made of brass that only speaks English?
What's an avacado's favorite instrument?
My band mate keeps accusing me off hiding her instrument
I swear, it's all bassless claims!
Why was the movie about string instruments in a mafia,rated r?
Because it had too much violins.
I'm not allowed within 500 yards of a musical instrument.
I'm a registered sax offender.
A man walked into a bar with his pet octopus. He went up to the counter and bet everyone in the bar $50 that they couldn’t bring the octopus a musical instrument that it couldn’t play...
One man pulled an old guitar off the wall that hadn’t been tuned in years and gave it to the octopus.
The octopus took the guitar, tuned it right up and began play.
There was no doubt that the octopus was an excellent guitar player.
The man paid his handler $50 and sat down.
Another man brought a saxophone to the octopus.
The octopus took it and stared for a bit.
After a minute or two the octopus began playing a deep and soulful jazz solo.
This man paid his $50 and sat down.
The bartender went into the back and brought out a set of bag pipes.
The bartender said, “I’ll bet $100 that the octopus can’t play these bagpipes.”
The man agreed and handed them to the octopus.
The octopus sat there eyeing the bagpipes up and down for quite awhile.
The handler began to get nervous so he said to the octopus, “Hurry up and start playing the thing”
The octopus spewed, “Play it?! I wanna marry her!"
I met a girl who can play a wooden instrument developed by indigenous Australians.
I get very aggressive when I'm forced to play certain stringed instruments
Don't make me use violins.
Which musical instrument is most likely to take legal action against the others?
What do you call a whale song with no instrumental accompaniment?
Did you hear about the man who was beaten with stringed instruments?
It was a brutal act of violins.
Are musical instruments therapeutic?
Well, accordion to science
My favorite writing instrument
What do you call a slutty musical instrument?
Accordion to research, 9 out of 10 people don’t notice it when you replace random words with musical instruments.
I recently found out that in most schools nowadays ...
Brass instruments are band.
What instrument do you play with your foot?
What instrument do Australian's play in Israel?
For several days each month, some friends and I get together, play instruments and sing in a medieval style.
I guess you could call it my minstrel period.
What do you call it when Brahms' instrument has a flaw?
It's Baroquen
Sorry fellow dads don't know a better way to phrase this feel free to repost if you have a better way of saying it
I was carrying my ukulele around in its case and my friend asked, "You play an instrument?"
I replied, "Yeah, I play a little guitar."
I have a friend who told me he collects large ancient Greek instruments in his free time
Accordion to a recent study, 90% of people didn’t realize
I put an instrument at the start of this sentence.
What did the musician shout before he dropped his woodwind instrument?
Whats the best instrument to fall on you?
Piano because it's the softest!
Guitars are the most depressed instruments
They're always getting picked on.
What’s an honest person’s least favorite instrument?
I saw a guy beating somebody up with a string instrument, so I intervened.
I said to him, “Violin is not the answer.”
What happens when a musician went insane?
He go completely instrumental
Which instrument is the most indecisive?
What instrument does a ghost like to play?
I donated a camp chair to the orchestra instrument drive.
I heard every symphony has a first chair.
[Help] I am asking this girl to prom and putting the message on a button... she really likes puns but I can’t come up with any can I have some help?
She really likes debate, she runs a debate club. She likes chocolate cake. Her favourite animal is a tortoise. She is really good at playing instruments and she plays the bassoon. Anything will help, thank you!
To help me focus on working, background music is instrumental
Mostly because I'd get distracted if there were vocals
What is a locksmith's favorite instrument?
A lieutenant of a marching band had lost his piccolo, he went to a music instrument-store and asked for a piccolo
The store keeper said that they ran out of stock of piccolos but he could rent out a flute, the lieutenant agreed promptly.
After the performance the lieutenant came back to the store to return the flute.
The store keeper asked if he was the flute tenant
No I am the lieutenant
What instrument hates coffee?
Whats a stoners favorite instrument?
My ex-girlfriend used to beat me with stringed instruments.
I didn’t know she had a history with Violins.
My new favorite instrument is Steel Drums
Because even when they're broken, they're steel drums
Is Mayonaise an instrument?
Context
https://preview.redd.it/nftfc81x97621.jpg?width=773&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c4f05e96613369d2d3f7b97316752ddc83d52bcc
Found in here.
Saw it and laughed hard and needed more people to see it. Go over there and give the guy the Karma he deserves
What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?
What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?
What do you call a group of killer whales playing instruments?
What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?
What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?
Accordian to a recent survey, replacing words with the names of musical instruments often goes undetected.
What do you call a group of killer whales playing instruments?
What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?
What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?
What do you call a group of killer whales playing instruments?
Accordion to a recent survey replacing words with the names of musical instruments in a sentence often goes undetected.
What do you call a group of killer whales playing instruments?
What is a skeleton’s favorite instrument?
Accordion to a recent survey, inserting musical instruments into sentences largely goes unnoticed.
What do you call a bunch of whales playing instruments?
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