Whatβs a monkβs favorite unit of measurement?

Ohms

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π€︎ u/Claw198
π︎ Dec 20 2020
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What is the cannibal carpenterβs favorite measurement?

8 feet

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π€︎ u/SholcCTR
π︎ Oct 24 2020
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What unit of measurement do you use to weigh your linens?

Sheet tons.

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π€︎ u/lawnboy18
π︎ Sep 30 2020
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A "helen" could be used as a measurement of beauty, defined as a face that could launch a thousand ships. However, one should not use a "millihelen" to mean that a face could only launch one ship...

...because you shouldn't put metric prefixes on Troy units.

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π€︎ u/IncompotentCyborg
π︎ Nov 28 2019
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Why did all the measurements listen to Volume?

Because it was the liter

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π€︎ u/Cyborg_Nate
π︎ Feb 11 2020
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What unit of measurement does a serial killer use to weigh its victims ?

Kill-o-grams !

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π︎ Oct 31 2019
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I identify as a measurement of speed...

because I want to km/s

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π€︎ u/100mypete
π︎ Apr 14 2019
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When my classmate, Abhi, couldnβt remember what the unit of measurement of frequency was, he started thinking really hard.

My science teacher then said βAbhi, it looks like your head really hertz!β

This actually happened 2 minutes ago

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π︎ Apr 26 2019
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Someone told me that there is a name for a measurement from the earth to the sun. That's pretty large I said

It must be one astronomical unit.

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π€︎ u/MasterCheezOtter
π︎ May 20 2019
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When someone says Joules are the superior unit of measurements for energy

Watt the fuck

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π€︎ u/EoinTheBest123
π︎ May 24 2018
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What is a vaperβs favourite unit of measurement?

Joules

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π€︎ u/namrepus__
π︎ Jun 17 2019
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Knowing the measurement from the tip of your thumb to the tip of your pinky finger is pretty handy.
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π€︎ u/-Kfrey
π︎ Apr 18 2019
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Based on a real measurement.
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π€︎ u/regiinmontana
π︎ Aug 08 2018
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The carat, a unit of mass for gemstones, and a measurement of purity for gold, takes its name from the Greek word for a carob seed from the Legume family.

No wonder they are called the Pirates of the Carob Bean.

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π︎ Feb 08 2019
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What is the most painful unit of measurement?

Ow!nces (ounces)

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π€︎ u/BeerAndJameson
π︎ Dec 04 2017
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What unit of measurement is used on snakes?

Inches, they donβt have feet

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π€︎ u/lobsman12
π︎ Nov 15 2017
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Why do people in Skyrim use dragons for measurement?

Because they have scales

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π€︎ u/KrishaCZ
π︎ Mar 30 2015
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What is Tim Burton's favourite measurement?

Johnny Depth

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π€︎ u/Fman7
π︎ Oct 31 2015
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