Danger, Fear, and Panic came knocking at my door. It'd been ten years since the last visit, and all holding clipboards, were ready to begin the inquisition. Nervously, I opened the door and prepared myself to answer their calling.

"Sense us."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jeromocles
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2020
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Do you know why the Spanish inquisition was so inhuman?

Because no one inspects the Spanish inquisition

 

(For those who don't Monty Python, explaination

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πŸ‘€︎ u/live4lifelegit
πŸ“…︎ May 30 2016
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Your mom and I almost named you the Spanish Inquisition

because nobody expected you.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ajr30
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2015
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Little known fact, the Spanish Inquisition was formed entirely of Dads

http://www.smbc-comics.com/comics/20140905.png

Source: Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Deku-shrub
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2014
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What do you call an inquisitive Hispanic rodent?

Por quΓ© pine.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/habsfan1112
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2020
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There are two unwritten rules in life
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πŸ‘€︎ u/felinebarbecue
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2021
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Now that I’m officially a dad I have my first good joke. Me and my wife are driving down the road and a bug splats the window.

I turn to her and say β€œI bet he don’t have the guts to do that again”

Edit: holy shit y’all this blew up. Thank you master dads. I feel worthy

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πŸ‘€︎ u/johnpowers99
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2020
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You say yes, I say no

body expects the Spanish Inquisition!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/user_error101
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2021
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My favorite song goes a little something like this: "De Spa..."

Nish Inquisition.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AfricanWarrior96
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2021
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What did the inquisitive hatchet say?

I need to AXE you a question....

Hahaha, my husband is so proud of this joke. Came up with it all on his own.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/meandthecrowbar
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2018
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I bet none of you will see this one coming

1

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Quint_Cordewener
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2019
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People always ask where I got my incredibly detailed tattoo done, but they never believe me when I tell them Spain.

Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2019
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What noise does an inquisitive German car make?

Warum warum

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThaneOfMordor
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2016
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I am terrifed of elevators

So I am going to start taking steps to avoid them.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/darksider201cz
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2019
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Whenever I tell my friends that I got my incredibly detailed tattoos in Barcelona, they seem surprised.

Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2018
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If the whole world goes vegan..

No one will expect the Spinach Inquisition

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hitno
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2019
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A wizard dies and they lock up his ashes in a lamp

The lamp is then fastened by the sea, just so none of the townsfolk get into trouble. One day, an inquisitive young chap opens the lamp and the wizard starts wreaking havoc upon the town. All the scientists gather and decide to chemically dissolve the lamp. But all the chemicals they have fail to work. They try to burn it, melt it and what not but nothing works. Finally one scientist says β€œI know exactly what we should do. Pour excessive chemicals and try to dissolve it. I know we’ve tried it before but let’s give it another shot.” They bring in acids and other corrosives from the neighbouring cities and pour it on the lamp and it successfully dissolves and the wizard disappears. Everyone is amazed and asks the scientist β€œHow did you know about the extra chemicals?” The bald, black scientist looks at them and says β€œOh that’s easy. Moored urn problems require more darn solutions.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lordoflethargy
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2019
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We had a pop quiz on conjugation of the verbs "ser" and "estar"...

I wasn't expecting the Spanish inquisition.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2019
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I was really surprised at how many questions the Spanish exchange student asked today.

I honestly didn't expect so much Spanish Inquisition.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MightyOtaku
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2018
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Just 5 minutes ago to my wife...

There was a loud noise from the dining room. I walk in to see my wife slumped over the table. She answers my inquisitive look with "I just clocked my knee."

"How fast was it going?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AngryBaldWhiteMan
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2015
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aaaaaaaand the assist

i was sitting at a counter, eating my lunch, when this guy and his wife come in and start getting really inquisitive about the beer list. they finally order something. after they've had a few sips:

waiter: how's the beer? guy: i don't know, it has a "moorish" taste to it. waiter: ... wife: he means he's going to probably want "more" of it.

part of me wants to believe that this was a successful assist on her part, but then part of me thinks the guy probably feels robbed of the punchline!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/make_em_laugh
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2014
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When ordering take out food...

This is something I do often and will get a wide variety of actions.

Cashier: Would you like a receipt sir?

Me (with a slightly weirded out and inquisitive expression): Are you sure you want me bringing this back once i'm done with it?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Snapsh0ts
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2017
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A fella with a chemical symbol tattoo

I asked him what chemical it was.

"Caffeine" was his reply.

It was only polite to apologize for my inquisitiveness: It would have kept me up all night trying to work it out.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PsychoPhilosopher
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2014
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What do you call an inquisitive Hispanic rodent?

Por que pine

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hesston97
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2017
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Knock, Knock...

The Spanish Inquisition...

NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/A_Telephone
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2019
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DadJoke comic by the great Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thirtyseven1337
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2014
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