As my impeccably dressed co-worker has aged, incontinence has set in.

He went from dapper Dan to diaper Dan.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
🚨︎ report
A joke my brother made

He saw a woodpecker today, and got as close as he could before turning to me and saying, "He's doing impeccable"

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/IzzieisAsleep
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2020
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What did the bird say when it found a brand new brick wall?

"Simply impeccable."

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sup-mr-stark
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2020
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I have a chicken proof lawn

It's impeccable

πŸ‘︎ 28
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hotsprings1234
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2019
🚨︎ report
What’s a characteristic of a perfect tree?

Being impeccable

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lanfructose_
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2019
🚨︎ report
My chickens can’t eat the new seed I got for them.

The seed is impeccable.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/IAMGROOTie9
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2019
🚨︎ report
My lovely tree is woodpecker-proof

My tree is impeccable.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tananar
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2018
🚨︎ report
Made some armor to protect myself against pesky birds.

It's impeccable.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/poohonhead
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2018
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Chicken proofed my yard today.

It's impeccable

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheManCaveGamer
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2017
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A dad got dad-joked by his own daughter

Took the kids to a bug museum this weekend and was walking behind this other dad and his kids for a good bit of the time. When we get to the leaf cutter ant exhibit, my three year old loudly says something to the effect, "Look at all those ants!". The dad turns around and says, smugly, "How do you know they aren't uncles?" My kids groan, his kids groan, all in a dad's work, right? Then his daughter, who was probably 8 or 9, pipes up, "Well, Dad, since they're all female, it's safe to say that are, in fact, aunts!"

Her timing was impeccable. She's going places.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2014
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I have a chicken proof lawn…

Its impeccable…

πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2017
🚨︎ report
I have a chicken proof lawn

It's impeccable

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13 2019
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I have a chicken proof lawn

It’s impeccable

πŸ‘︎ 35
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2019
🚨︎ report
I have a chicken proof lawn

It's impeccable

πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Clbull
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2017
🚨︎ report
I have a chicken proof lawn

It's impeccable

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/borispingpong
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2016
🚨︎ report

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