Homeland Puns

If you pee something, pay something.

Mom's boyfriend: "Do you mind if we watch this?"

Mom: "What is it?"

BF: "Season two of Homeland recap, Homeland: Debrief."

Mom: "Sure."

BF: "Sounds like what I do before each shower... debrief."

Sighs from around the room with a faint chuckle

He knows milkshakes bring The Boys to the yard.

Hopefully you're familiar with the comic/show

When an eel bites your hand, And that's not what you planned, That's a moray.

When our habits are strange, And our customs deranged, That's our mores.

When your horse munches straw, And the bales total four, That's some more hay.

When Othello's poor wife Becomes stabbed with a knife, That's a Moor, eh?

When a Japanese knight Uses his sword in a fight, That's Samurai.

When your sheep go to graze In a damp marshy place, That's a moor, eh?

When your boat comes home fine And you tie up her line, That's a moor, eh?

When you ace your last tests Like you did all the rest, That's some more "A"s!

In New Zealand you see An aborigine, That's a Maori.

Alley Oop's homeland has A space gun with pizzazz, That's a Moo Ray.

A comedian ham, With the name Amsterdam, That's a Morey.

When your chocolate graham, Is so full and so crammed, That s'more, eh.

When you've had quite enough, Of this dumb rhyming stuff, That's "No more!", eh?

They have asked for help from the Department of Ho Ho Homeland security.

After the Homeland finale:

Dad(whose name is Klif): I'm tired of all these cliffhangers!

Me: So I guess you could say... You're really hung up about them?