Even though I'm an avid duck and goose hunter, I don't own any calls.

My wife doesn't want me using fowl language.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/StuntsMonkey
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2021
🚨︎ report
A guy brings his friend to see his new lake house. When they get there, they see a goose on the front steps.

The friend says "hey, is he yours?"

The guy replies "yep, kept him after I found him alone by the lake. He can't communicate with any of the other birds."

His friend looked confused. "Is he mute?"

"No. I think he speaks porch geese."

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2021
🚨︎ report
What does an Egyptian goose say?

Ankh, ankh!

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2020
🚨︎ report
What kind of clothes are made with Australian goose feathers?

Down Under wear

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SplashbackDeuce
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2020
🚨︎ report
"Egg-plant" shirt by me. Never got why the vegetable was called that until I found out that they used to be white and look like goose eggs back in the day
πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/stephaniehuang66
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a fat goose?

A chonky honky

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/flippantteacup
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
🚨︎ report
After an argument, my cooking instructor wants me to stew goose feathers gently below or just at the boiling point...

She wants me to simmer down!

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2020
🚨︎ report
GOOse. Yea i know its stupid.
πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NeedsHelpBad2023
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Geese fly in a V-formation for aerodynamics, and when the lead goose gets tired he switches out his position. But one side of the V is almost always longer than the other. Do you know why?

More geese on that side.

πŸ‘︎ 57
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gamerspoon
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2020
🚨︎ report
I stole my friends goose by mistake

He told me to come over take a gander.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/badasscdub
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2020
🚨︎ report
A goose attacked a little girl for fun and said

I thought she'd duck

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BOTB03
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Lucy Goose
πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AshBashNinja813
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a goose with β€œwandering eyes?”

A gandering gander

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gardeningnovice
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2020
🚨︎ report
What did one goose ask the other after looking at the shit on the road?

Goose shit is this?

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SadLogarithm
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call panko fried goose?

Honkatsu

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GirtBySteez
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2020
🚨︎ report
A goose talking to duck at the local pond. β€œMy husbands gone away for a few weeks to Africa”. β€œOh really.” Says the the Duck β€œUganda?”...

β€œNo I’m a goose. My husband is a gander”

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cwwspurs
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Goose Bumps
πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/vdesi
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Goose bumps
πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Captainspookle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2019
🚨︎ report
pun help: naming an Egyptian goose

what do we got reddit?

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HalifaxJosh
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2019
🚨︎ report
When will Ryan Gosling be old enough to be called Ryan Goose?
πŸ‘︎ 82
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sheep_Thrills
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2018
🚨︎ report
I’ve come up with a new name for the Untitled Goose Game.

Titled Goose Game.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/I-think-Im-funny
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2019
🚨︎ report
I identify as a male goose

I guess that makes me transgander.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Valdagast
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2019
🚨︎ report
The ultimate dad joke a Hollywood could pull would be casting Ryan Gosling as Goose’s son in Top Gun 2.
πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Conan-doodle
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2019
🚨︎ report
Goose Bumps
πŸ‘︎ 123
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dainironfootdk
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call a goose that has changed sex?

Transgander

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/unwildimpala
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Goose was never going to make it as an ace pilot anyway....

He hit a glass ceiling.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GreatCrambino
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2019
🚨︎ report
As a computer programmer, I love goose-feather pillows...

Because they are down-loaded!

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2019
🚨︎ report
It would be funny if a goose would play Duck, Duck , Goose with you

β€˜Cause even if you call him duck, he would still chase after you.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2019
🚨︎ report
At what age will Ryan Gosling change his name to Ryan Goose?
πŸ‘︎ 207
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2016
🚨︎ report
if you teach a goose to use a computer, is it a technical fowl?
πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the goose flee after going to the haunted place

It had goosebumps

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GalaxyYoghurt
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2019
🚨︎ report
What does a goose get when it’s cold?

People bumps

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2018
🚨︎ report
If the plural of goose is geese then the plural of moose is meese.
πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/A-Aron_James
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2018
🚨︎ report
Why this goose got a more interesting life than I do?!
πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DawnOfArkham
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2017
🚨︎ report
The goose said to me, β€œquuuaack, quack quack?”

I replied, β€œquack, quaaack, quack.”

My brother said, β€œI didn’t know you speak Portugeese.”

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ChaosAvenue
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2018
🚨︎ report
I just bought a new goose, but it's massive!

It is truly humongoose.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call turbulence while riding a goose?

Goose bumps

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/camshend
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2018
🚨︎ report
I found out that my pillow is stuffed with goose feathers.

That makes me feel down.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Musicguy1982
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2018
🚨︎ report
If a goose can fly away from the sun at 20mph, how fast can he fly toward the sun?

puts hand over eyes and flaps the other arm like a wing 10mph.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/floragenocide
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2018
🚨︎ report
Have you heard about the goose that got into some drugs?

Apparently he's all ducked up on quack

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AmazinBacon
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2017
🚨︎ report
The Rolling Stone’s jet hit a goose, killing the drummer and the bass player…

Killed two stones with one bird.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/comeonyea
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2018
🚨︎ report
I went through the trouble of cooking goose and pairing it with a exceptional whisky, but my sister hated it.

Last night at the bar though she swore she need that fine rye and gosling in her life. I was sure it would Drive her crazy. What Eva

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PaxPaw
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2018
🚨︎ report
How’d the goose get a huge tax return?

His bill was tax de-duck-table

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MBTAHole
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2018
🚨︎ report
Why didn't the recently single goose lose her job when she made a mistake?

Because she had one heck of an ex-goose

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheFifthStep
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2016
🚨︎ report
Crossed a bridge over Goose Creek on a road trip

I turned to my girlfriend and said, "Look! Goose creek!"

After crossing over it and not seeing much i said, "Wasn't much to gander."

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DJReddyRed
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2014
🚨︎ report
1 pun was hidden from this page. Show all.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.