What do you call a geologist who stares at rocks all day?

A stoner.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/prendrefeu
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2021
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Why didn’t the geologist care about his foliated metamorphic rock?

He didn’t give a schist.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PahderShameen
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2020
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I asked my geologist friend what his favorite music was

He said rock

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TTVMixmix00
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
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Geologists are always so thankful

They take nothing for granite.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TTVMixmix00
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
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What do Geologists sleep on?

Bedrock

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MonkeyLord_11
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
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I'm bothered by lazy geologists who don't take the time to correctly identify rocks...

Sometimes they take this schist for granite.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mkrjoe
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2020
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My wife left her position as a Geologist to pursue her dream as a tennis coach...

...She went from studying faults to double-faults.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2020
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What did one geologist say to the other geologist?

Mind your own damn bismuth.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SirSoggyBalls
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2020
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What did the geologist say when he collected 69 rocks?

Gneiss

πŸ‘︎ 93
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Death_Muffins
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2020
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A group of German geologists recently made an interesting discovery within a mountain range of northern Italy

The team unearthed a layer of rock tessellations resembling a violin as viewed from behind.

As of yet they have no name for this strata variance.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Raidenisme
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2020
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Never date a geologist

They find faults in everything.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrsBunnyPants26
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2020
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I feel bad for geologists,

People always take them for granite. And I feel bad for tortillas too, They always get a bad wrap.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/chickenwaffleman
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2020
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β€œNation’s Geologists demand more money for Marijuana research” I guess those geologists are a bunch of Stoners.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sK197666
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2020
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I'm so proud of my hungry geologist dad...

He went to the kitchen and discovered there was stewtonite.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Davoided
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2020
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What’s the highest point in a geologist’s career?

When they hit rock bottom.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pakigod
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2020
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What Do You Call A Comedian Whose Parents Are Geologists

A barrel of laughs

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DJ_Linka_Gamer
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2020
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Geologists aren’t boring...

They rock

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ikennaezeee
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2019
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What did the geologist say when he found a 69 pound metamorphic boulder?

β€œGneiss.”

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Snaz5
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2019
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Dad: I started a band, we're called the Geologists.

Because we're a rock band.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/weirdinchicago
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2019
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Geologists often take things for granite.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pwndabeer
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2019
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My girlfriend is a geologist. For our anniversary I got got her a limestone jewelry box.

It has sedimental value.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThePeacefulBard
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2019
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How do geologists get their rocks off?

By breaking them and staring at the cleavage.!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GalaHunterX
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2019
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A geologist asked me if I like extremely high, steep hills with a flat top. I said yeah

I like big buttes and I cannot lie

πŸ‘︎ 95
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BearGuru
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2018
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what did one geologist say to the other

your shist at your job but he replied, that's not very gneiss

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fayrog_frog
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2019
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Why wouldn't the geologist get rid of his rock collection?

They were sedimental

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zeptil
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2018
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How did everyone know the geologist was a redneck?

He was an expert in RELATIVE dating

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fishslayer1995
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2018
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Geologists do crystal math
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kevbot0492
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2018
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Do you think geologists have an event around this time of the year called Arch Madness?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/YaBoiJFlo
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2019
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What kind of rocks doesn’t any geologist like?

J-eew-els.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pdonkey
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2019
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What is a geologist's number one rule?

Never take anything for granite.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrWildstar
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2018
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I bet the career of a geologist can be...

Pretty rocky at times. Though I am sure if they can stay grounded they won't get buried by it all.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/IDreamofNarwhals
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2017
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Why did the geologist go to jail?

He was charged with basalt-and-battery. He was a pretty gneiss guy, I guess we just took him for granite. Pretty schisty for him, though.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mondonodo
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2015
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Every year my town has a 4th of July track meet during the day, and any age can compete. My geologist dad, heavy set and not ready to compete, entered the mile and obviously did poorly, but he crossed the finish line, gave me a shit-eating grin and said:

"......gneiss guys finish last."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SoDakZak
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2017
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What spell would a geologist in the world of Harry Potter use to find oil?

Expecto Petroleum

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ChewbaccaNZ
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2018
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My geologist dad imgur.com/vopHJFy
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πŸ‘€︎ u/suddenly_dolphins
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2013
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At what rate does a geologist map?

A mylonite!

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tiffasenko
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2016
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Saw a geologist helping an old lady cross the street today and I thought...

...what a gneiss person

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SoDakZak
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2017
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How do you know you should become a geologist?

You’re obsessed with rocks to a fault

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GabeRothel
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2018
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I like being friends with geologists.

They're really down to earth.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pookie_face
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2015
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Former Geologist Enters Post-Rock Phase thehardtimes.net/2016/08/…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mrlenny94
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2016
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A judge recently sentenced a geologist's chauffeur to prison...

He was found guilty of trafficking miners.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/guydoingthings
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2017
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What did the geologist call his favorite rock?

Favor-ite

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TruHarley
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2017
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Did you guys hear about the geologist who got his Bachelor's Degree?

He graduated Magma Cum Laude.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kevingcp
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2015
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Geologists arent Boring

They rock

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bigni44a
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2019
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