Gene Pacman.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/awesome_smokey
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2021
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My wife insisted she has nudist genes

I responded that nudists are defined by their lack of jeans

Edit: there->their

Edit 2: Awards? Wow! I'd like to thank the Academy, the community, my wife, and the man who made this post possible, my father in law!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/S93C141
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2020
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My son asked me how far somebody’s genes can go.

I said β€œas far as you walk with them.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheRealDiehl05
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2021
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My dad once told me he had really good genes.

β€œI thought they only had two pockets,” I said.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TTVMixmix00
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2020
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My friend Gene changed his name after he moved to Germany.

Now he's E.U.Gene

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheManWithTheFlan
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2020
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Illustrations like these are gene-rally ill-conceived eggsagerations
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mehssie
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2019
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How do you tell a boy Gene from a girl Gene?

Look for genetic makeup

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ajohn555
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2020
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Why is it called hereditary depression and not blue genes?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bot_10
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2019
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scientists have inserted the gene for THC into yams

they can now grow baked potatoes

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πŸ‘€︎ u/berninicaco3
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
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What do Gene Simmons and Paul Stanley do after an argument?

They KISS and makeup

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πŸ‘€︎ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2019
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What is the best place to get some good genes?

Forever 23

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cthenarwhal13
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2019
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With all of this gene modification I feel like we should be having the talk about

Gene-β€œethics”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zalot
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2019
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Scientists have discovered the gene for shyness.

They would have found it sooner but it was hiding behind a couple of other genes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/arutkow
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2019
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Genes
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LogicBossX
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2018
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Me to my husband: I got my 23&me results back and my genes say I am better off on a low-carb diet.

Him: But what did your shirt say?

It was so unexpected, I was proud!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nickifoxx
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2018
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In order to be efficient, I named my parrots Roger, Gene, and Mick.

Two Byrds, one Stone.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2018
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I Use to Work with a Guy Named Gene...

Every so often I'd see him in the bathroom brushing his teeth after lunch. Of course, I would greet him with, "Hi Gene!" I'd then turn away and do my business all while giggling to myself.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/octobert
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2019
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Wife: I’ve got a lot of crazy genes in my family

Husband: Personally prefer blue jeans, but whatever floats your boat

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SeraphimSkies
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2018
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Today my colleague told me that her Asian genes kept her young-looking.

I pointed to her pants and asked her where she bought them...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Genetic_Heretic
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2017
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Give Peas a Chance [Gene: An Intimate History by Siddhartha Mukherjee] imgur.com/y7pD6Qr
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lansaman
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2017
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If Elon Musk and Bill Gates put their genes into a baby, the baby would get longer...

The baby will elongate.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ethan_Roberts123
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2018
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My girlfriend said that I probably don’t look my weight because of my genes

I said β€œI don’t wear jeans”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Liqqa
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2018
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Designer genes imgur.com/h8VPoDy
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ElderCunningham
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2014
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You got the same genes

So I'm in the kitchen with my brother and dad and I told my brother he wasn't my family and he then said "yes we are we have the same genes" Then my dad chimes in and says "no you don't your brother has a 31'32 Jeans".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Noisyes
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2014
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Told my wife that Gene Cernan, the last man on the moon, died yesterday at the age of 82...

She responds, "Why the heck did they leave him up there for so long!?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PivotalPixel
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2017
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I guess he has some grumpy cat in his genes
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Blacky_1207
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2014
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My wife is expecting in March so in preparation, I have been working on my dad jokes. She was just thinking about whose features will be more dominant when our little one arrives. She then asked me whose genes were stronger.

I said "probably Lee or Levis." I laughed for about 5 minutes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mmoffitt15
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2017
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Apache Genes
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dysPUNctional
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2014
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GF talking to my dad about genes.

Dad made this 5 second ago.

GF: You have a lot of genes that are not being expressed right now.

Dad: Um, no, I only have one pair of jeans that i like.

P.S. I am unfortunately inheriting all of his jokes. This one being a mild one.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sramtq
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2016
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Studying for bio and asked my dad about the four methods of gene transfer...

"You go to the mall - that's one. The second method is you drop off a load of donations at Salvation Army. Third: you're picked up by a backhoe and transported to a pool of radioactive material in the middle of the garbage dump and your jeans are magically transferred off of you as you disintegrate. And the fourth? By policemen carrying out a court order in a maximum security prison."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GimpyBallerina
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2014
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My sister has the dadjoke genes.

Sister's friend: When I get my driver's license, I'm going to get a stick. Sister: Cool! I'm going to get a car!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/poi830
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2014
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I used to be a genetic determinist, but then I found out my genes were pants.

http://www.reddit.com/r/todayilearned/comments/2ik2tw/til_a_neuroscientist_accidentally_discovered_that/

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nanogyth
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2014
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Genes

About two years ago, my sister got married. After the wedding the photographer said she wanted pictures of my grandfather and sister.

As she was setting up my dad goes to the photographer and says, "guess my fathers age," to which she replies, "hmm..60?" My dad says "70, would you believe it?"

The photographer gasps and says "wow! 70? Those are some great genes you have." In which my father says, "huh? Genes? I'm wearing dress pants, it's a wedding," rolls his eyes, and walks off.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Startingariot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2013
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