My doctor was trying to describe the treatment plan for my frostbite.

I couldn't picture it, so she showed me a faux toe.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cobclob
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2021
🚨︎ report
One time I got frostbite on my big toe. They were able to save the toe and not amputate...

I just barely stayed out of the "toe-away" zone.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire ?

Frostbite

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Amart1985
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2021
🚨︎ report
My 5 year old just got me with this one: What do you get when you cross a vampire with a snowman?

Frostbite!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ilikecake81
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2021
🚨︎ report
Elsa and Dracula had a child.

They named him Frostbite.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/skycooper11
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Some Christmas Dad Jokes

Why are Santas reindeer generally drenched with water?

Because they are rain-deer.

Why did Santa have to visit the psychologist?

He had low elf esteem.

source

Why are Christmas trees so uncoordinated when it comes to sewing?

They always drop their needles.

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a hungry mosquito?

Frostbite

​What did Adam say to Eve on the night before Christmas day?

It's Christmas Eve!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bmantis311
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
🚨︎ report
I’ve been seeing less and less of my wife lately.

She says she has Anorexia

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πŸ‘€︎ u/brianj106
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the ice dog?

His bark was worse than his frostbite.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pikapoleon
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2019
🚨︎ report
What did Frosty the Snowman and the Vampire name their child?

Frostbite

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sa12u
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?

A frostbite! (This may have been said earlier but I decided to put this anyway)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GlebtheGoat
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2019
🚨︎ report
What happens if a wolf attacks you during the winter?

Frostbite.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LateV_28
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Why didn't the vampire suck the snowmans blood?

He'd get frostbite

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bxn_12345
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2019
🚨︎ report
What are frozen Band-Aids used for?

Cold cuts.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fine-rusty-knife
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2016
🚨︎ report
Halloween Puns

Why couldn’t the witch have children? Her husband had a hallow weenie.


Which ghost is the best dancer? The Boogie Man!


Friend: What are you gonna be for halloween? Me: Drunk!


For Halloween I’m going to write β€œLife” on a plain white T-shirt and hand out lemons to strangers


This Halloween, the only Candy I’m interersted in swings from a pole and has daddy issues


β€œHalloween” = an excuse for girls to dress up like sluts.


Thank goodness for Halloween, all of a sudden, cobwebs in my house are decorations!


I’ll be your trick if you’ll be my treat.


How do Rednecks celebrate Halloween? Pump kin!


When do ghouls and goblins cook their victims? On Fry Day


What’s a monsters favorite desert? I-Scream!


What do you call a Halloween boner? Petrified wood


What do you call a dancing ghost? Polka-haunt-us


What do you call a hot dog with nothing inside it? A β€œhollow-weenie!”


Did you hear about the wild party at the haunted house? The whole vibe was anything ghost (goes).


How do you write a book about halloween? With a ghostwriter.



I’m going to celebrate Halloween the same way I always do… by murdering a bunch of teens by the lake. Sincerely,


Two monsters went to a Halloween party. Suddenly one said to the other, β€œA lady just rolled her eyes at me. What should I do?” The other monster replied, β€œBe a gentleman and roll them back to her.


The lesson of Halloween is that pretending to be something you’re not will lead to a sweet reward.


I remember when Halloween was the scariest night of the year. Now, it’s Election night.


I want to be something really scary for Halloween this year so I’m dressing up as a phone battery at 2%.


Why dident the skeleten go to the halloween party? Becuse he had no body to go with.


What did the bird say on Halloween? Trick or tweet!


What do Italian’s eat on Halloween? Fettucinni Afraid-o (Ha ha ha)


Why can’t the boy ghost have babies? A. Because he has a Hallo-weenie.


What do goblins and ghosts drink when they’re hot and thirsty on Halloween? A. Ghoul-aid!!!


What do ghosts eat for supper? Spooketi


What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house? Hope it’s Halloween!!


What is the most important subject a witch learns in school? Spelling.

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Punsville
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2017
🚨︎ report
Alternative name for a polar bear

Frostbite

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πŸ‘€︎ u/XtremeHacker
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2017
🚨︎ report
Playing Star Wars: Battlefront with a buddy...

Me: "Hey, you know the engine that this game runs on right?"

Him: "Yeah Frostbite. Why?"

Me: "Then should we play on Hoth to really showcase the engine?"

He proceeded to set the controller down and walked out of the room.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/edwards6745
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2015
🚨︎ report
Dadjoked my GF a while ago

My girlfriend put in a couple breath mints and was shocked by how strong they were.

GF: "Wow! My mouth is really cold!"

Me: "Don't get frostbite."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zaraki93
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2014
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you combine and vampire and a snowman?

Frostbite

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πŸ‘€︎ u/apathy714
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/justbeatitTTD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a vampire with a snowman?

Frostbite

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ajhw13
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FlintTheDad
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DeletedForSpamm
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire ?

Frostbite

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2020
🚨︎ report
What happens when you cross a snowman and Dracula?

You get frostbite!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Itsame_Daario
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite!

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Afalafgaming
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a vampire with a snowman?

Frostbite

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WhatTheCoolyDude
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bones82
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2019
🚨︎ report
What's the cross between a vampire and a snowman

Frostbite

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kittenowner1234
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a vampire with a snowman?

Frostbite

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dohpaz42
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?

Frostbite

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πŸ‘€︎ u/havocprim3
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?

Frostbite.

πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?

Frostbite

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πŸ‘€︎ u/electric_leper
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get if you cross a snowman and a vampire?

Frostbite! HAHAHAHAHA

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mr_McMuffins
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?

Frostbite

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CuddlyBear89
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?

Frostbite

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SyberiusRoss
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a Snowman with a Vampire

Frostbite

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a vampire with a snowman?

FROSTBITE

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SoulOfCthulhu
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_solidwarp_
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2017
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?

Frostbite

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cat_queeen
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2017
🚨︎ report

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