Some foreign languages have gendered words.

How der they?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/I_Think_Naught
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2021
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I have a business selling foreign ants.

It's Important.

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2021
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I don't mind foreign dishes, for example we ate some halal food last week

I think they called it Allah carte

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ledgerdemaine
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2020
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Finland is offering foreign tech workers the chance to relocate to the Nordic country for 90 days to see if they want to make the move permanent.

If they don't, after the 90 days they will finnish being Finnish

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πŸ‘€︎ u/akodo1
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2020
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My grandad used to say "If it wasn't for me, you'd all be speaking German right now" Lovely man, terribly bad foreign language teacher.

No idea why the school hired him.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/the_houser
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
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These comments where from a clip where someone cleaning at a foreign range almost gets hit by a stray bullet
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PbyFortress
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2020
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I had a friend in high school who was a foreign exchange student, and he always took mine and my friend’s e-cigarettes

We called him the international juul thief

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πŸ‘€︎ u/minimikjr
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2020
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A queen went travelling to a foreign land. She asked her two ladies in waiting to clean for each other while she was gone, so they wouldn't be out of practice when she got back. When she returned, the two had fallen in love and gotten married.

They were maid for each other.

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2020
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My friend started a business exporting artificial limbs to hospitals in foreign countries.

He’s an International Arms Dealer.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2020
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The US army secretly trains pigeons to help overthrow hostile foreign governments.

It’s a military coo.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2019
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Why are handcuffs sometimes carried by foreign visitors?

Because they were designed for two wrists.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sonicxwwe
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2019
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My teenage son came home upset that his crush is attracted to the new foreign exchange student at school

So I went to the drug store and bought him the best Axe Scent money can buy!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KingBuck_413
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2018
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So my foreign friend and I went hunting

So the other day, me and a foreign dude I know went hunting in the woods (you know, since it’s such an classically American thing (I know)). Anyways, so while we’re there, we get attacked by a four armed bear. Luckily, we were able to kill it before it killed us. Then I realized how rare this was, so we decided to take a couple of arms each as a trophy. So I let him, the foreigner, have the left pair, while I, as an American, got the right two bear arms.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JacobMHS
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2018
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What does the foreign secretary keep in front of his door?

A diplomat.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sandy-bridge
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2019
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Shopping at foreign outdoor markets

Is just bazaar.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Serinitatis
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2018
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My dad always tells my sister to not let a boy ever get foreign with her

With Russian hands and Roman fingers.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HYPERxNIGHTMARE
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2017
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I really need to stop inserting words from foreign languages with my friends.

Saw a girl, at the bar, told my friend "she's a nein." He told me to head to the eye doctor.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/geebsnstuff
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2019
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My girlfriend and I were talking about driving in foreign countries.

Her: "Urban Italy looks like a bad place to be with a rented car."

Me: "Yeah, I suppose there are some very old & busy cities there."

Her: "I don't know if I could do it. My Dad drove in Greece and that was bad enough."

Me: "Oof yeah, sounds sketchy. Though you'd think they'd have cleaned it up by now."

Her: ?

Me: "The grease."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/robcap
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2018
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I guess dad jokes are universal, just got dad joked by my foreign language penpal

I have a penpal from Spain I talk to a lot. Today we were chatting on Google Chat in English, and the topic of whether or not sea lions were dangerous came up.

Me: okay google says "sea lion saves man" has 976,000 results

Her: that man has sinked so many times

Edit: Bonus, she continued laughing at her own joke.

Her: hahahahaha

Her: i cant stop laughing

Her: it was so bad joke

Her: hahaha

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πŸ‘€︎ u/digbybare
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2014
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So, I hear in Texas there's this foreign car factory which is the only place in the world where they make...

...the Audi Partner.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/florinandrei
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2018
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Just realized I dad joked the foreign exchange student the first day of track practice.

*walking down the line asking everyone their name.

And whats you name?

"Lauda"

WHATS YOUR NAME?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GoodLuckLetsFuck
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2014
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What kind of pasta is a covert foreign agent?

Spy-ghetti

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ChrisTheCoolBean
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2018
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An English sports team recently played a foreign team called Real Sociedad ...

Me: "Where even is Sociedad?" Dad: "I don't know son, I've never been to Socie" He was like http://i.imgur.com/EAf5il.png and I was like http://i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/312/563/05d.jpg and my mum was like http://media0.giphy.com/media/Rhhr8D5mKSX7O/giphy.gif

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πŸ‘€︎ u/marl0we
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2013
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Foreign Math professors...

So my sister is a freshman at college and after a week my dad asks her how classes are going. She says all is ok except that her math professor is Russian and she can hardly understand him. My dad without missing a beat "He's Russian? well tell him to slow down then"....

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pancakes4Lyfe
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2013
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The wounds were caused by foreign bodies.

https://www.reddit.com/r/quityourbullshit/comments/5vemhh/texas_hunters_who_accidentally_shot_each_other/

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wolferines
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2017
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If we're sharing foreign dad jokes.

This all happened in french so you none french speaking folk might not find this very funny. I saw /u/OHDEERGOAT post his Swedish dad joke and it reminded me of this. On a road trip a while back, I spotted some sort of bird of prey (means rapasse in french, which also sounds like repasse which means to return) so I tell my GrandPa about it. He says, "you know kid, bird of prey, Γ§a passe et Γ§a rapasse."

He's dead now, but we will all remember him for his sense of humour.

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2014
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Every god damn time we're eating at a restaurant in a foreign country

After eaten everything, the waitor comes to take the plates. Waitor: Are you finish? (As in done, typical bad english) Dad: Noo, We're Norwegian..

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Got_my_bacon
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2014
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Foreign Studies

A phone conversation with father

Dad: Hey t_muld I haven't seen your friend Rachel lately.

Me: Yeah she's studying abroad.

Dad: Oh what's her name?

Me: (Long sigh)

Dad: t_muld are you there? I said what's her name?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/T_muld
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2014
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This one works great in foreign countries too

You know what my favorite beer is?

The next one

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ostapack
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2014
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Foreign italian dads friend

"Look at the blacks playing football they still look like their behind bars" (football facemask on braxton miller)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/joshuacrook
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2013
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