FYI Puns

Taste MUCH better than Dove Soap.

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Because it's capsized

She’s so grounded. I’ve warned her repeatedly about slamming The Doors in this house!

Edit: shored= shouted obviously, damn fat fingers

If you find this joke in the sub or other subs please link...

Toes

Daschund through the snow.

A psycho was recently arrested for train robbery. He spoke both English and Spanish, although all we've heard is that he had some sort of loco motive.

.........It is a step by step guide

Edit: oh my god wow, thank you for the silver!

Because everyone has the same DNA

Because it has no seeds.

What did the Super Hero Waiter serve to the Vegan Villain? Just-ice

I guess he has a cent sensitivity.

FYI: I thought of this joke last night at work, so to me it’s OC but I wouldn’t be surprised if someone else thought of it before me. Either way I figured I’d share it, if someone posted it before me feel free to link it.

ABBA Zombie and Witch.

It was InTents.

FYI I’m ready for your best fire puns.

Discussing The Hunger Games, our teenage daughter asked, "Wasn't Katniss named after a root?" My ribald reply: "All babies get named after a root."

My son got me with this one today. Fyi Merci is our dog.

Son, "Merci's an alcoholic."

Me, Huh? (confused)

Son, "because she can't control her Licker."

We are heading to Buda, TX soon. Honestly, I'm not sure how to pronounce it, but I mentioned it to her and said "Bud-uh" like a Budweiser. She replied, "I think it's pronounced Boodah."

With a wry smile, I said, "I can't believe it's not Bud-uh!"

Edit: I've decided to pronounce it Bud-ah while we're there and use that response with everyone who corrects me (unless I'm right, in which case... I'm right).