Apparently transparency is very important to them.
(I'll let myself out...)
Posthumorus
Heath Ledger
The campsite reports that it is the first time that they've encountered such a tent nickel difficulty.
She tooted at the breakfast table and I told her to say "excuse me", and she did.
Then she says, "when you toot at the table you have to say 'excuse everybody'
Brutal.
Sitting in the backyard on a beautiful Mother's Day evening, the topic turned to our church organist who is absolutely awful and serves as the source of much pain and humor for my family.
Dad: After all these years you would think he would be able to play at least one song without a mistake.
Mom: In his defense, the pay is almost nonexistent. It's basically volunteer. So his heart is in the right place. pause His fingers just aren't!
Belly laughs all around. She was bright red laughing at her own joke. Well deserved.
A rip-off!
A lot of it is inflation.
I expected a free fall.
Does that mean I had a valuable experience?
Just luck," the hungry man replied, sadly. "I happened to move that small piece of potato, and there it was!"
I hope it’s not a wind up
It’s all overhead
To a degree, yes.
Must have cost him an arm and a leg
Buying one would be a Google flex
No bed of roses
But one look and I realised it was a small price toupee.
Elon musk
And Shia's cheap thrills
It's too high a price 'toupee.'
A Bill-Ding!
I needed to cosine for him.
Dad: The steaks have never been higher.
A rip-off
But it just made scents to me.
Ambulances, I can't stand them.
They charge you a lot
The prices keep going up due to inflation
Because they cantaloupe!
The steaks are high.
After all, it always costs more for a womb with a view.
Her: How expensive?
Me: I dunno. Maybe $25,000.
Her: You could buy a car for that!
Me: That's a bit excessive -- I don't think it needs its own car.
The waiter responds “It’s tap quality”
You have no taste.
He replied Dwayne Johnson
He couldn't a-FORD it.
(This is not original, I saw it somewhere else, not on Reddit)
I'm tired of being taken for granite
A man is walking into an expensive restaurant when he is stopped by the Maitre'D, who tells him that he can't be admitted without a necktie. The man, late for his appointment, runs back out to his car and searches high and low. Finally, out of desperation, he grabs a set of jumper cables, ties them into a rough knot around his neck and runs back into the restaurant. The Maitre'D stares at him for a few seconds and finally says, "Alright, I'll let you in..." and then leans in and says in a low growl, "but you'd better not try to start anything."
The latter.
Fortunately, deer nuts are still under a buck.
My Dad has recently shown a fascination with space and NASA. Long story short, Christmas is coming up and my plan is to surprise him with an all expense paid trip to Florida for 4 days with passes to the Kennedy Space Center. I’d schedule it around a launch so he would be able to see it in person. As well as checking out the area a bit since we’re there.
Which is where I need your help! I want to coordinate hints with presents that slightly hint at the trip. For example, I picked out a NASA tshirt, a space shuttle plush toy, assorted astronaut ice cream, socks that have planets and a rocket on them, mug that says “coolest dad in the galaxy,” a map/atlas of florida, and luggage tags. And the final gift I’m thinking will be a letter that puts all the clues together and would include the plane tickets, car rental agreement, hotel confirmation, and the admission tickets in an envelope.
Can anyone give me ideas on what hints to use??
- I’m still adding/taking away present ideas so if anyone has any better ideas please let me know!!
Thank you so much!! Any type of help is appreciated!! I don’t really have that “creative” part of the mind... whether it be a rhyme or dad joke-y type hint, it doesn’t matter!
..because they cant-elope
and it was all because he was told to please take a seat
Because he was a cantelope.
they cost an arm and a leg
