When it gets light, I start eating.
My middle child, who loves rice, declined the yellow rice we offered him because apparently he only likes one type of rice.
Without missing a beat my daughter (11 y/o) exclaimed, "stop being rice-ist."
My job is done, clearly there is no more I can teach her.
Bernie Tung?
Tofu
... like moUths to a flame.
They want their peas and quiet.
Because they're full of anty bodies.
βArmageddon hungry!β
In our defence, a person who sells vegetables is grocer.
Because theyβre always dribbling.
Terrible joke #2 brought to you by my six year old.
They've got a lot on their plate.
Because they pause but they donβt stop
But those who sell you fruits and vegetables are grocer
"I've eaten herbivore."
it was in tents.
I said, "A DNA test."
I was at my in laws yesterday and I had an epic comeback.
MIL: I'm having pizza for dinner.
Me: Yeah and you'll get a pizza that tastes like a pizza. (She said she likes her pizza to taste like a pizza none of that BBQ chicken pizza stuff)
MIL: Ok. Coming from Mr Picky who didn't eat anything before he came into my family.
Me: The only thing I came into was your daughter.
To add to it all my wife is pregnant.
...so a 'salad' for me consists of purely lettuce, and nothing else. Whenever I eat it in my school's dining hall, I get funny looks from my friends. Thankfully, my dad taught me this one to help.
So, I tell my friends that my salad is a 'Honeymoon Salad'. When they ask what that is, I respond 'Lettuce Alone'.
because there full of anty bodies
