Do you guys like 'darker' puns
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/AmoebaInYoFace
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 08 2018
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Darker times
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Bongnazi
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 11 2020
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Do you think Chinese food has gotten darker?

Maybe its just dim sum

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/drolicheck
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 07 2018
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Last night it seemed darker than usual.

Me: Hey doesn't tonight seem darker than usual?

Co-worker: Well isn't it a new moon or something.

Me: Well what happened to the old one?

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Senpai_notices_me
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 15 2016
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A bit of a darker joke from my dad

On the news report during dinner, a man was arrested for raping his niece.

To which my dad responded, " I bet he was on his niece, begging for forgiveness."

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/idkjay
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 30 2013
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For some what darker Dadjokes, check out /r/HeyCarl/

http://i.imgur.com/4T3awam.jpg

http://i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/512/447/417.png

http://24.media.tumblr.com/097ab89f865a7f061f15edc795c136dc/tumblr_mxcqbqQk3I1rc4b8ho8_500.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/Qjsyzh0.jpg

http://www.reddit.com/r/HeyCarl/

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Deku-shrub
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 17 2014
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Close your eyes.

Itโ€™s dark, isnโ€˜t it?

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/lydrian
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
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(True story) My GF asked me to kill a spider in the bathroom today.

It was so small that I couldn't even see it at first. She had to point it out, a tiny brown pinhead crawling up our slightly-darker-brown cabinet about knee-high.

"How did you even see that?" I asked.

And she answered, "With my spider-sense."

I love this woman so, so much.

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๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
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Learned the difference between Bananas today

There are 1000 species of banana in the world and the difference between the lighter ones and the darker ones are because the lighter ones lacatan.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/rdegannes87
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 25 2019
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What do the sun and nail polish remover have in common?

They can both make your acetone darker...

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/MusicmanJosh03
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 15 2019
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The stars are bright

My dad is a Navy Vietnam vet who is about to be a retired GM electrical engineer. He is retiring against his will because he has had three strokes, colon cancer, a pulmonary embolism, necrotic esophagus, renal failure, pneumonia, basically a medical shitstorm and he survived it all. In the process, he has lost a lot of memory and quite a bit of his cognitive abilities and furthermore, his balance. However, when I took out the trash tonight at nearly half past ten, I couldn't help but notice how beautiful the stars looked outside tonight. So upon returning, I told my mom and dad "The stars sure are bright tonight. They look amazing." To which my dad then asked, "You know why they're so bright, right?" Now I'm an amateur astronomer. Hell, my first and only telescope was inherited to me by my mother who got it from her father. So knowing its winter and I live in Michigan, I tell my father, "Because its so cold and dry, the star light isn't blocked as much?" His reply; "No. Its because the sun went down. So now its darker outside." Dad: 1. Me: -5.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Hyperbattleship
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 18 2015
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This one slipped out of me, she hasn't dumped me yet though...

Her: I have to get home for a party. Bob's 50. It's a surprise.

Me: No, I'm pretty sure he knows how old he is

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/arhnold
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 07 2017
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I didn't get this one until I was older, when my brother was told the same "story."

Dad: "You know, we're actually descendants of one of the oldest native tribes in this part of the country, right?"

Me: "Really?"

Dad: "Yeah, The Fagawee tribe. I remember when I was little, your grandpa took me on a spiritual pilgrimage through the forest. He drank a lot and smoked some native herbs. The herbs didn't seem to be working, though, because as it got darker, we seemed to be walking in circles. It was cold in the woods and we seemed to keep coming across the same old log. Finally, in the middle of my dad's spiritual trance, he fell to his knees in a clearing, raised his hands high, and proclaimed "We're the Fawagwee!"

Translation: ("Where the fuck are we?")

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/cookyflukemegg
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 30 2013
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Where is the Lighter?

Right next to the Darker!

hehehehehe

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TerminalReddit
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 25 2013
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My lady friend is a speech-language pathologist. Her clients delivered.

BACKGROUND: Strokes can cause communication disorders, such as aphasia. This gem happened the other day.

Her (discussing beer with client): You like darker beers? I respect them but I prefer lighter ones like Spotted Cow.

Client 1: Different strokes for different folks, I suppose.

Client 2: Literally

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/JaeqPiegDeivys
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 19 2015
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Well, he's not wrong...

We are watching a show about the dark side of humans. A guy on the show says "but why do we have a darker side"

Dad:I thought that was called melanin

My mom had think about that one for a bit

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TheGulpmaster
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 20 2014
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