A cabbage, a tomato, and a nose were having a race.

The cabbage was ahead, the nose was running, and the tomato was trying to ketchup.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jollyflyingcactus
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2021
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At our restaurant, we make sure to buy our pickled cabbage from a variety of vendors.

We've discovered the value of kraut sourcing.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OpulentTooth
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2021
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A truck overturned this morning spilling cabbage all over the highway.

It was horrific! I slaw it happen!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dogtarget
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2020
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Hi guys and WELCOME BACK to another video of The Disapproving Cabbage!

...If you liked this video and would like us to make more, lettuce no!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SumFunnyOne
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2020
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A truck ahead of me spilled its load of cabbage all over the highway...

I never slaw it coming.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
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I went shopping at Coles to buy Mayonnaise, but they said it was illegal to buy without cabbage and carrots.

It’s Coleslaw

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
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My neighbor got killed by a truck hauling cabbages

He never slaw it coming.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/blechniven
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2020
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Murphy’s law states that if something can go wrong, it will. Cole’s law is mostly cabbage.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/leonard_face
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2020
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Did you hear about all the competition in the outdoor pickled cabbage contest?

It was a krauted field.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/citrusguy9
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
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Two vegetarians got married and soon had a baby who they named Cabbage.

"Was it a girl?"

No, it's savoy.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bonanza86
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
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I made a cabbage, carrot and corn stir-fry tonight! The recipe called for tilipia, but I put in pork. I realize now that I should have put in chicken, though...

...it's supposed to be a C-food stir-fry.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wmcduff
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2020
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Apparently if you buy cabbage from coles supermarkets you are legally obligated to buy carrots and mayonnaise

They call it, Coles law

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πŸ‘€︎ u/StarvedAsian
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2020
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Did you hear that Elon Musk has invented a car that runs entirely on sliced cabbage?

He calls it the Colesla.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Perrin42
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2019
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Did you hear about the cabbage that died?

There was a big turnip at the funeral.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Markod91
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2019
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Cabbage Opress
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πŸ‘€︎ u/qekqekqek
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2019
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Any left over cabbage shall be shredded and mixed with mayo!

-Cole’s Law

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πŸ‘€︎ u/browserleet
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2019
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The amount of cabbage is directly proportional to the square root of the carrots divided by the volume of the Mayo.

That’s Cole’s Law.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2019
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Everyone knows that Old King Cole was a merry old soul, but few know about his mandate that all his subjects had to eat cabbage and mayonnaise

It was Cole's Law.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fragglet
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2019
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What is the scientific principle which describes the movement of cabbage in mayonnaise

Cole’s Law

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Scorpoll
πŸ“…︎ Jul 12 2019
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Why didn't the cabbage win the race?

He wasn't ahead of lettuce.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/McPresh
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2019
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Every time I have cabbage I'm out of mayo, and every time I have mayo I'm out of cabbage. It's like some kind of Murphy's Slaw.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rawlingstones
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2016
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I ordered an Italian salad, and it didn't even have any of that bitter, red, cabbage-like stuff...

How utterly radicchio-less.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sickmission
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2018
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I went to Cole's this morning to buy cabbage, apparently its a legal requirement for me to also purchase carrots and mayonnaise when purchasing cabbage.

It's Cole's Law.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eng69
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2018
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Only cabbage for Christmas

So my wife was rooting through my desk to get an envelope and stumbled across one of her Christmas presents that I hadn't wrapped yet. I told her that she's bad for snooping and that I would have to send it back.

Due to recent environmental regulations and the price of coal, it is no longer given to naughty people for Christmas. Instead you get a cabbage. It will come thinly sliced with mayonnaise.

This is known as Coal's Law.

"That was the whole setup wasn't it for that line"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mjbehrendt
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2018
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What's the difference between a sick baby cat and a hole full of cabbage?

One's a pale kit

The other's a kale pit

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2018
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I have discovered the optimal ratio of cabbage to mayo!

And I shall name it Cole's law

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dretland
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2017
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What do you call a finely chopped cabbage from Eastern Europe?

Slawvic

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Arugula278
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2017
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What did the cabbage say to the tree?

Lettuce leaf

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πŸ‘€︎ u/iceberger3
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2017
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I was cutting cabbage real thin when I cut myself...

...It was Murphy’s Law and coleslaw colliding.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Toberoni
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2017
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What's it called when a cabbage kills someone?

Slaw-der.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LordDemonJackal
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2017
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What did they call the popular cabbage in vegetable school?

Cool Slaw

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πŸ‘€︎ u/chronicpie
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2017
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I could never tell my mother that I hated the stuffed cabbage rolls she packed me for lunch.

I have a lot of emotional cabbage

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πŸ‘€︎ u/IdoDeLether
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2015
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(after a giant plate of Haluski (a Czech cabbage dish)) girlfriend- "my rule tonight, you CANNOT fart in my car..."

Me- I guess you'll just have to drop me off at the gas station then.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RNrhinorrhea
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2017
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What do you call two rows of cabbages in a field?

A dual cabbage way

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Arcticsandwich
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2014
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