I called up Weight Watchers, told them there was an emergency and asked for them to send someone round!

Turns out they’ve got loads of them!

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ‘€︎ u/DantheMan350V2
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2021
🚨︎ report
Weight watchers
πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ‘€︎ u/HeroHirsch
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I tried out a weight watchers group therapy session but no one would talk about their experiences.

There were just too many elephants in the room

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Nightman_82
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Weight watchers

Dad: to celebrate my joining weight watchers with you, let’s go get a dozen donuts each Mom: that’s crazy! Do you know how many points are in a dozen donuts Dad: just go on line and check Mom: ridiculous! A waste of time! It’s pointless Dad: touchΓ©! Let’s go

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ‘€︎ u/garlaham
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2018
🚨︎ report
For a redditor who is a bird watcher

The real joke is in the cormorants.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ‘€︎ u/Henri_Dupont
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2018
🚨︎ report
I completely bombed my Weight Watchers job interview...

I guess watching fat people in the park isn’t considered relevant job experience.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ‘€︎ u/nickmidas
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2018
🚨︎ report
Weight watchers

At a social function, dessert was being offered. Guest: (refusing dessert) ah no thanks, my wife and I recently started weight watchers Dad: oh, so do you wait and watch each other?

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ‘€︎ u/huntedpadfoot
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2013
🚨︎ report
FWD: Fwd: FWD FWD: Fwd: Emails from Dad


The International Rules of Manhood

1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.

2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:

(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.

(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.

(c) After wrecking your boss' car.

(d) When she is using her teeth.

3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.

4: Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.

5: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.

6: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.

7: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy's choice.

8: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.

9: When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.

10: You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she's officially your girlfriend.

11: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free.

12: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.

13: Unless you're in prison, never fight naked.

14: Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.

15: If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything.

16: Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.

17: A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.

18: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy.

19: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.

20: Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she's withholding

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ‘€︎ u/CampConcentration
πŸ“…︎ May 30 2014
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.