Where do golf balls watch the news

The TEEvee

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πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2019
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"Did you hear about the new zombie game that all they do is watch dough rise?"

"It's called Bread Rising."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/QuitePasta
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2020
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Did you guys watch the news? Someone poured oil all over a major Jordanian city and heated it up.

It was Petra frying

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πŸ‘€︎ u/chadnav
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2019
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My wife told me to pick a bigger New year's resolution than "watch more sports on TV".

Unfortunately, our TV only does 1080p 60fps.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/My_Name_O
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2019
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Where do people with pasta furniture watch the news?

On the tagliatelly.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2018
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New Apple watch
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Deathlysin
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2019
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Guys, I got a new Apple Watch for Christmas!
πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ItzYaBoi25
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2018
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You should watch Titanic when you meet someone new.

It's a good ice-breaker.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/machi_koro
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2019
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Not only does my new girlfriend like to watch soccer, she also plays it.

I think she's a keeper.

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hughdman
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2018
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I wanted to watch the new Advengers: End Game

But, I don’t have the stones to do it

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2019
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when you buy a new watch one of the part will still be second hand
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πŸ‘€︎ u/irrationalpii
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2018
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Watch out for this new computer bug
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shiverstar
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2018
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Kids wanted to watch a new anime, so I suggested...

Kid 1: Let's watch -Japanese name of some anime-

Kid 2: No, let's watch -Japanese name of some other anime-

Me: Let's watch Supphomi!

Kid 2: "What the hell is Suppho... (realization dawns) mi..."

Me: NOT MUCH HOMIE, WHAT THE HELL 'SUP WITH YOU?!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Technohazard
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2016
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I've been thinking of purchasing a new watch

It's a time consuming process

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TT_SirHC
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2018
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Whenever I'm feeling down, I watch 'The Emperor's New Groove'

It helps Yzma pain.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Crash_86
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2017
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Dad made us all come in and watch a news segment

It was about the man in Texas who stole steaks from Walmart, then led police in a car chase and began throwing the steaks out the window. Dad made us all watch the entire segment just so he could tell us, "Looks like it was a steak-out!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sponch426
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2016
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πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/layover_guy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2017
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I have been getting my son a new watch for Christmas every year for the last ten years

He sat me down the other day and asked why a watch?

β€œI guess it’s just been something to pass the time”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThePootKnocker
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2018
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Did you watch the new comic book movie?

It was very graphic!

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheRtHonLaqueesha
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2016
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Showing my daughter my new Apple watch....
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πŸ‘€︎ u/misterdob
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2015
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