What washes up on the shores of small beaches?
2 pebbles washes up on the beach. One says to the other, "Are you married?"
Other replies, "No, I'm shingle."
My wife uses a whole bottle of dishwasher every time she washes the dishes at night.
Another day, another Dawn.
Dad washes car with his son
Son: Can't you use a sponge?
During the lockdown I'm wiping my banknotes with sanitizer and washing all the coins with hot soapy water.
I hope, I don't get arrested for money laundering.
What do mermaids wash their fins with?
Landed a good I think while pressure washing today.
Me: Well son the driveway was long over due for a cleaning.
My son: oh yeah? Was it?
Me: I think evidence is pretty concrete!
He gave me the eye roll and head back, a win in my book.
I just had a new wash basin delivered to our house for our guest bathroom, but my wife decided that she hates the design so much she won't even let me bring it in off the porch. It has been sitting by our front door for a week, A ENTIRE WEEK.
There was a knock at the door this morning. I opened it and there was a wash basin on the doorstep.
I thought, "I'd better let this sink in."
I accidentally left some money in my jeans as they went through the wash.
I just worry because I know it’s illegal to launder money.
I found a load of batteries washed up on the beach.
I was collecting C Cells on the sea shore.
I accidentally left some AA batteries in my pocket when I put them in the wash
That's what I call clean energy
Recently, I’ve been building a car made from old washing machine parts
I’m going to take it out a spin tomorrow
A sales guy tried to sell me on a new preparation to wash my hair with, which supposedly contains the excrements of some very special rainforest animal or whatever.
I cook my food by myself, wash my dishes by myself, and tidy my house myself.
One can say that I am 'self-maid'
I don't use shampoo when I wash my hair.
I'm a man - I use real poo.
Just going to have to wash my hands off this one!
Had a race to see who could hang out our towels on the washing line quickest.
I was washing my car with my friend,
Until they said, ‘can’t you just use a sponge?’
A man was washing the car with his son.
The son asked, "why don't you use a sponge instead?"
I don’t wash my ass
Because I don’t let shit bother me
I washed my whites today. They got so clean,
My family was doing the dinner dishes together and our mum was washing the dishes in the sink. She asked “could you guys load the dishwasher please?”
So my dad brought her a glass of wine.
Turns out our washing machine DOES have a “baby poop” setting.
It’s called “Heavy Doody.”
One day, a father was washing a car with his son...
The son asks, "why can't we just use a sponge?"
Is washing my hands technically a germocide?
His career was washed away
My son was washing some dollar bills the other day
He said it was money laundering
I’ve always hated washing my hands with hot water
But I’ve started warming up to it
I used to be a pro at washing my hands.
But now I'm all washed up.
My wife tried to help me and washed my bear costume in hot water. It shrunk outa my size!
What is the leading cause of dry skin?
Geroge Washing Ton and Bill Clean Ton
I usually sing with a deep voice. But when I wash my hands,
If you ever have to cancel plans with friends your excuse should be that you have to wash your hair in a lukewarm shower with high quality dandruff shampoo.
At least that way your friends can never call you flakey.
I got arrested for forgetting to take out my wallet before washing my pants.
I was charged with money laundering.
On a post about a washed up whale. This person SEAS the opportunity and they take it!
What do orca whales at sea world use to wash themselves?
When I want to experience intense ecstatic happiness, I reach for the bottle of dish washing liquid...
I just built a car out of a washing machine.
I’ll be taking it for a spin later.
I sold my washing machine last week because i had a $20 bill in my last wash
I didnt want to be caught money laundering
What washes up on tiny shores?
What washes up on tiny beaches?
What washes up on tiny beaches?
What washes up on tiny beaches?
What washes up on Tiny Beaches?
What washes up on tiny beaches?
What washes up on small beaches?
Dad can I wash the car with you ?
I dunno son, I prefer you use a sponge
What do mermaids wash their fins with?
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