Remember the story where a woman assaulted a police officer by spraying her with breast milk?

If I were her attorney, I could get a not-guilty verdict using the First Amendment. She was exercising her freedom of expression.

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📅︎ Apr 05 2018
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What does the forest put in its house?

Fir-nature.

My 5 year old told this at dinner. Either she heard it somewhere or I need to enroll her in Comedy school. What's the verdict?

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👤︎ u/mitks07
📅︎ Aug 22 2017
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Accidental Dad joke when my brother graduated.

My brother graduated about 4 or 5 years ago now. When he did he phoned my mum to give her the verdict on his grades. I was asleep at the time and she yelled up the stairs to me to tell me the good news.

> Mum: hey! Tom's graduated with a 2:2!

> Me (half asleep): When did he take up ballet?

It took me a while to figure out why my mum was laughing so hard.

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👤︎ u/NejKidd
📅︎ Jun 27 2014
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