I was thinking of making an investment on a new farming venture that feeds marijuana to cows instead of grass.

The steaks will be too high for sure.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Negative_Integer
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
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Did you hear Christopher Cross retired as a musician to make time for his new business venture?

Chris Cross Applesauce

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NoMoreTerritory
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2020
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If two broke pot-heads pooled their money to buy a blunt would you call it a joint venture?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shadow_Boxer1987
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2018
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What happens when two weed companies merge together?

They become a joint venture!

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/maraudershake
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2020
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Samsung's recent business ventures are really blowing up in their face.
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2016
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It's been too cold to venture out the past few days. I'm not sure if cabin fever is setting in, or if dad's sense of humor has always been this lame.

We were all sitting there watching an Animal Planet special on bird migration (not by choice, the remote died), and after a few minutes apparent contemplation dad let this one loose on us.

"Did you hear about the ornithologist whose expedition was cancelled due to a severe snow storm?

I guess you could say things took an arctic tern for the worst!"

I think I may be booking a seat on the soonest ice floe out of this burg just to get away.

Oh no, he's got me doing it! It's spreading - run, save yourselves!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/barthm1
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2015
🚨︎ report
Nissan pun not related to Liam

The year is 2045, space travel has finally gotten started.

As major companies scramble to come up with ways to capitalize on this new venture, Nissan decides to end its most popular light truck.

As the last one rolls off the line, they announce: "This is it, folks. This is the Final Frontier."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dolaandronas
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2019
🚨︎ report
Id like to give a shoutout to all the sidewalks

For keeping me off the street

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2017
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I had to work with two different hospitals for my Knee Surgery...

It was a joint venture

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Warrenni
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2019
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I wanted to make a joke about leafy greens

But that’s venturing into uncharded territory.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/missjits
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2017
🚨︎ report
Snoop Dogg and Dr Dre started growing marijuana in their back yard

It was a joint venture.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Clbull
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2017
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My buddy and I are going to open a dispensary

It's a joint venture.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DJDyel
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2018
🚨︎ report
A man obsessed with tractors

A 22 year-old man was obsessed with tractors, so much so that he had no social life outside of his fascination with farm machinery. His mother eventually intervened, forcing him to throw away all of his tractor merchandise and ordered him to find himself a girlfriend.

The man went to a bar that night in search of a partner and encountered a beautiful blonde. After exchanging pleasantries, the two moved outside in order to have a proper conversation away from the music. As they ventured into the smoking area, the woman complained that she hated the cigarette fumes which had engulfed them. Without flinching, the man took a huge, deep breath and inhaled all of the second-hand smoke in the vicinity.

Staring on in amazement, the woman asks how he could possibly have removed the smoke from the room.

The man turns back to her and replies: "I'm an ex tractor fan"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pablord13
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2015
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Got my boss at work.

Boss said he wanted to start branching out into venture capitalism. He asked if I've ever watched Shark Tank and said that we'd be like that, only smaller.

"So, basically, a fish tank."

Thank goodness he found it funny.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Happy_Buddy
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2015
🚨︎ report
Went to the store with my dad to pick up some ingredients for dinner...

He really wanted some cherries but the store was sold out. As soon as we got to the checkout he turned to me and said "Guess this was a fruitless venture." Groans ensued.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JacobPsy
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2014
🚨︎ report

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