As a kid, I thought veganism and lesbianism were the same thing.
I realize now, both lifestyles lack meat
My girlfriend totally changed when she became a vegan
It's like I never knew herbivore.
My recently passed dads favourite vegan joke.
If I ever became vegan it would be a huge missedsteak.
My wife became a Vegan recently
She’s changed a lot and it’s like I’ve never met herbivore.
Why can't some Christians be vegan?
They can't seem to stomach seitan.
Might be an old one that someone else's said but it made me chuckle.
How do you know if someone is vegan?
I called in an order for pickup at my local vegan grocery, but they said they don't serve devil worshipers...
All I said was: kale, seitan.
Don't turn vegan...
It would be a big missed steak.
What did the vegan say when they ate a plant based chicken nugget?
Did You Know That Dr. John Dolittle has a vegan brother named Jack?
What is the name of farm owned by a vegan lesbian couple?
Policeman taking a witness statement from the waiter after a shooting at a vegan bar..
Policeman: Can you describe the shooter?
Waiter: 6 feet, white male, grey shirt and a skirt made of parsley.
P: Parsley?
W: Yes. It was just a herb he wore.
If two vegans get in a fight...
... is it still considered a beef?
Today I learned that Bruce Lee had a vegan brother.
My wife has changed dramatically since becoming a vegan.
It's like I've never seen herbivore.
What's a vegan bodybuilder's response to protein powder?
You know why Vegans can't hate people?
What do Vegans do when nobody watches them
I ran into this vegan girl who said she knew me
I had to tell her I'd never met herbivore.
My Vegan girlfriend left me over the meal I cooked last night.
What can I say? M'steaks were made.
I don’t know why everyone seem to have a problem with vegans.
I have never had a beef with one.
What did the dad say when he cooked a big game dinner for his mostly vegan friends?
I’m sorry, looks like I’ve made a huge moose steak
Vegans and Vegetarians can not have gender reveal parties
Because you must first veal before you can reveal.
And yes, I just said this to my wife. She can't wait until our kids are teenagers and I can tell these jokes in front of their friends.
We all have that one vegan friend.... I said to mine,"Do you have to mention vegetables every time you open your mouth?"
She said, "Not neccecelery."
Is an argument between two vegans still called a 'beef'?
I have been told by my vegan friend, that I should grow my food and not hunt it...
Does anyone know how to grow bacon ?
My wife asked me “can vegans have dogs?”
What kind of self defence do vegans use?
My wife wants to go vegan
I feel like my marriage is at steak
What do you call a vegan coffee?
A vegan told me, "People who sell meat are disgusting!"
I told them "people who sell fruits and vegetables grocer"
Found out martial arts expert Bruce Lee had a vegan brother
Why do vegans only use Zoom?
Because they hate Google Meet.
My vegan daughter just came out as a lesbian...
I called it being Vagitarian.
Interesting fact, Bruce Lee has a vegan brother
If two vegans get into an argument
Is it still considered beef?
I regret going vegan
It was a big missed steak
Did you know Bruce Lee has a vegan brother?
Just read an interesting fact - Bruce Lee had a vegan brother;
I went on a blind date with a vegan girl.
My wife has changed dramatically since becoming a vegan.
It's like I've never seen herbivore.
My daughter really changed a lot after becoming a vegan.
It’s like I’ve never seen herbivore.
If two vegans get into a fight...
...is it still considered a beef?
Just read an interesting fact - Bruce Lee had a vegan brother.
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