What's the difference between Michelob ultra and pure gold?

One is a minor fined, the other is a miner's find.

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2021
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He used to be ultra strong
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Leash15
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2020
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Ultra strong toilet paper should be called heavy doody
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kylieelaine3
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2019
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Where do ultra conservative Muslims go to buy trinkets, crafts, and home goods?

Wahhabi Lobby

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GeorgieWashington
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2017
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Who's the coolest person in the hospital when the ultra sound man isn't around?

The Hip Guy

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TehSniper
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2017
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Got dirty dadjoked by my ultra conservative father.

My wife and I were visiting my parents yesterday and we were discussing their neighbor that is pregnant.

My mother: "They got engaged before she got pregnant" My father: "Sometimes they get REALLY engaged"

I groaned.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/buffalo-jones
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2014
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What did Yoda say when he saw himself in 4K?

HDMI

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheFoxMaster00
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2020
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A chemist froze himself to -273.15Β°C and everyone called him crazy but personally,

I think he was 0K

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Niyi_M
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2020
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That would be terrifying
πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ShadowsGirl9
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2019
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I could post a lot here but I don't want to pack too much of a pun-ch
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FunnyUsername153
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2017
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I decided to prank my roommate

by pretending to jack off in front of him. It wasn't a good bait, or an ultra bait.

It was a master bait.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/maraudershake
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2018
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I went into my wife's ultrasound with high expectations.

I was really disappointed, the sound quality really bad. (Ultra Avx)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anthonybrose
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2019
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What's the opposite of the illuminate?

Ultra Nate, cause you're free to do what you want to do!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Naiphe
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2019
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Court Chester: Cell of the Century

Chester, the defendant, stood in front of the judge's imposing bench, waiting patiently for the reason why he was there. To further muddle the moment, he stared at items unfamiliar to him, at least in that context.

Perched on and near His Honor's desk were the following: A DuraLast Ultra in one car with a long, black cord stretching to another car, several alkaline D cells plugged into a black box, and lastly, a cell phone with its cord sticking into the wall.

Finally removing Chester's questioned look was his attorney leaning into his ear to whisper, "It's official, now: You're facing battery charges."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bradstros
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2019
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Who is the nicest guy in the hospital?

The ultra-sound guy.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KLC26
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2018
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Who are the nicest people in the Hospital?

The Ultra-sound Guys

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KrayzeKeef
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2018
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What is your New Years Resolution?

Mine is in Ultra HD.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/elmaninho
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2017
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My sister had her first child last night.

The doctor had done a quick hand held ultra sound and told them they were having a girl a few months back. Last night they were surprised with a boy. They had no boy names picked out. I said the most appropriate name would be "Tucker"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/good_life_pa
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2015
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Who is the coolest person at the hospital

The ultra sound nurse

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cfcnotbummer
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2021
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Who's the coolest person in the hospital?

The ultra sound guy.

When he's not at work it's the hip replacement guy.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DjangoVanTango
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2019
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Who is the coolest guy in the hospital?

The ultra sound guy

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kanenobaka
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2018
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Who are the nicest people in a hospital?

The ultra sound people

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Codetemplar
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2017
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Who's the coolest person in the hospital?

The ultra-sound guy

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πŸ‘€︎ u/csbndg
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2017
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