John Bon Jovi has started an extremely strict fruit only diet...
If a friend left you 12 bottles of wine on your doorstep, would you be extremely....
My trademark for extremely small grains of rice was rejected
Not sure why. I call it "Minute Rice" and it only takes about an hour to cook.
Its extremely rare for a defibrillator not to work.
But when it happens no one’s shocked.
This sub's extremely inactive...
There hasn't been any posts this year!
(Reposted at 12:01 AM 1.1.21 after a duel with autocorrect)
My extremely low effort drawn out pun. What’s it trying to say?
EXTREMELY proud of my 5 year old son for this uninentional one:
Son: Dad...we need a net.
Me: Why?
Son: To catch our flight.
I'm sorry, but I'm extremely proud of this one, and nobody in the chat found it funny =(
Did you know: in boxing, it’s extremely important to have perfect form when going against a new fighter...
because the fist impression is everything.
JFK was an extremely intelligent man
His brain was so big that it covered his entire car.
Polar bears are known be extremely moody and sometimes even mate with their own gender.
Thus truly making them bipolar
A toilet, a urinal and a very drunk sink are all at the front of a club, fighting and arguing with the bouncer to allow them and their extremely intoxicated friend inside.
Repeatedly shouting “Let that sink in!”
My wife is extremely upset that I've been drinking brake fluid
She shouldnt be mad, I can stop any time I want
My date was really excited when I invited her over for cocktails, but she left extremely disappointed.
She didn’t want to hear stories about my rooster.
I have this pet rodent with extremely large feet.
What did the doctor say when everybody left his office extremely slowly?
"I'm losing my patience!"
When I was young, I was extremely bright.
Because of this, my dad called me "sun."
The question was: "How do people with extremely long fake nails properly wipe their butts after pooping? Saw someone struggling to type on their phone today with those bad boys"
People who spam gas grenades in shooters are extremely toxic.
In an alternate universe, instead of asking for whatever he touches to be gold, Midas just asked for his jokes to be made extremely hilarious.
Everything was comedy gold.
When we got married, I was extremely poor, but my wife stood by me during those times.
She had to. We only had one chair.
What do you call a snake that's extremely overweight?
All the 70s solo female artists seem extremely vain to me.
They are a bunch of pre Madonnas.
My wife was extremely pissed off by my poor sense of direction...
So I packed up my stuff and right.
Saw an extremely tall guy at the airport
Friend: "Wow, it must be really difficult for him to fly."
Me: "You'd think it'd be easier, he has longer arms."
A geologist asked me if I like extremely high, steep hills with a flat top. I said yeah
I like big buttes and I cannot lie
My friend wanted me to take care of his extremely fragile pumpkin.
I told him I’d gourd it with my life.
There are extremely large bodies of water that have never been touched in any way before.
I guess you could call them the virgin seas.
I'm extremely interested in researching antibiotics and their effect upon diseases...
I guess you'd say I'm cure-ious.
Thanks ladies and germs! Tip your servers!
My doctor just diagnosed me with extremely low blood pressure.
His prescription for me is to assemble two IKEA wardrobes.
Brass and Bronze are extremely friendly...
Cuz they're alloys.... geddit
I attended a child’s birthday party of a rich friend of mine, and it was extremely formal.
For fun, we went Roberting for apples.
I am from Britain and visited America last week. I noticed that the ketchup tastes extremely bad,
In heinz-sight I should have brought my own
WHAT IS EXTREMELY SPOOKY HALLOWEEN STEW FOR YOU TO EAT
I got a new bucket yesterday that I’m extremely happy with.
The last one pails by comparison.
Did I tell you guys about the extremely rude cactus I met the other day?
Even though he extremely skeptical, the hunchback’s wife finally convinced him to see a surgeon to straighten his spine. When the operation was done, he came home and told his wife:
My dad told me this extremely inappropriate joke at a family dinner:
Allegedly, this happened a generation or two back in my family:
After having given birth to her first child, a far out aunt of mine was asked by a younger girl if it didn't hurt to push out a baby. Her husband broke into the conversation saying "No, of course not! If I could get seven pounds into her, then of course she could push seven pounds out!"
And there we sat, the entire family, in total awkward silence...
What do you call an extremely rich person who lives in Rio de Janeiro?
A brazilionaire!
The dinner table was quiet for a solid 5 minutes, a personal record for my family.
I find most 70s solo female artists extremely vain.
They are a bunch of pre madonnas.
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