Saw a truck towing a horse trailer pulled over by the police

Must have been hauling a$$.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mullet0ver
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2019
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Dad once tried towing a dogsled with wild Australian dogs.

It dingo.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bigfoothobbit
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2019
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Did you hear about the Band Director who got fired and started a car towing company?

He called it Stuck Auto.

It was a huge success and he found time to focus on his passion for martial arts founding a new school based on starting slow and building up speed. It's called Crush En Do.

It was most noticeably used by a section of the terrorist organization in the United States Capitol. They're known as the D.C. Al Coda.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rannak
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2018
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If there was a film about a car towing a boat,

Would there be a trailer?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/allurrice
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2019
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I was speeding while towing a load of donkeys.

Naturally I got pulled over. When the officer asked me "Do you know why I stopped you today?" I replied....

"Because I was hauling ass?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Inarus06
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2018
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This towing company.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fat_Hitchhiker
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2017
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a little Xmas pun
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jonseyzfan
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
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While riding down the road today, a fish jumped out of a boat that was being towed, and smashed into the front of my car.

It wasn't all bad though, I love grilled fish.

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2020
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What is a con artist's truck towed with?

A pickup line

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BrotherTausil
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2020
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Why was the dog towed away?

It did not pay barking ticket

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πŸ‘€︎ u/crazyjarvis
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2020
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Get it, 'cause it's a tow truck? v.redd.it/jhzjiwg10lk41
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Wheat_Thins
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2020
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Did you hear about the 2 Tow Truck drivers who wanted to elope?

They got hitched.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/acherem13
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2020
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My son accidentally smashed his foot on the table and as he was hopping around the room screaming in pain, I rushed to the phone, picked it up and asked him, "Do you want me to call..."

"...a TOE TRUCK!!??"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2020
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Looks like he could use a tow...

...or a hand.

Credit to my 3 year old.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JellyBellyGiggles
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2020
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There’s a new film coming out about the incorrect use of tow bars on cars..

The trailer just dropped.

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2019
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What's bigger than a tow truck?

A foot truck!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kori_a
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2019
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'I go where im towed' [oc]
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2019
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This slogan on a tow truck.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/purplelefint
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2018
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Who do you call when you break your toe?

A tow truck

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πŸ‘€︎ u/captaincapsaycin
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2020
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What did the triceratops tow with his tow truck?

Tyrannosaurus Wrecks

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ComeFindMeGilbert
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2019
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I saw a lady riding a camel and being pulled by a truck... It was a camel tow
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dubaidadjokes
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2019
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E.T.

My wife and I driving to work one morning:

Me: That tow company is called E.T. Towing Wife: I wonder if the driver's name is Elliott. Me: I wonder if E.T. tows home. Wife: ... Me: You're welcome.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/anaginggamer
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2020
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I'm upset. I called for a tow truck...

...and they sent a hooker.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spotted_Lady
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2018
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Have you seen one of those tow trucks before?

They're tow-tally amazing!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/3lite_9ner1
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2019
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I got a nail in my tire coming home from the grocery store. My meat, milk, icecream... Absolutely ruined while waiting on a tow truck!

Should've bought asparagus

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tj_xraybanvision
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2018
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Pulled into my job site (tow truck)
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NavyDragons
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2018
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Has this been posted here yet?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mythoclast-
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2019
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Wife asked me to move the car in case it got towed
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πŸ‘€︎ u/argjin
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2018
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Did that truck get towed?

Yes it was towed to move.

This was my response to my son's question today when we passed by where a disabled truck had been sitting by the road for a few days.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/withaph64
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2018
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My car got a flat while I was driving today...

It was a treadful, deflating experience which left me feeling flat and tired.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2020
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I was driving this morning when I saw this tow truck driver sobbing uncontrollably and looking miserable.

I thought to myself, β€œThis guy is heading for a breakdown.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2018
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My son just asked me, "Can we pick my friend up?"

Me: I dunno. How heavy is she? Son: In a car dad

This happened only moments ago. You can't just softball 'em in like that, son.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/89iroc
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2020
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A cyclist is struggling up a long steep hill

A cyclist is struggling up a long steep hill on his bike, when he is met by a good Samaritan in a car. The guy offers him a long rope to tow him up the hill and the cyclist gratefully accepts. By the time they get to the top of the hill, the guy driving forgets he is towing the cyclist and heads on to the highway, with the poor cyclist ringing his bell in vain. In the meantime, a couple see them drive past their car on the highway and the wife turns to her husband:

"Wow, that car's going pretty fast, isn't it?" The husband replies, "the car?! Look at the cyclist behind him! He's going so fast he's ringing the bell to get the car to move out of the way!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wildlumpfish
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2020
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Kid tow away service, does it still count if I'm a mom?

A strangers car broke down and they left it in our yard for a week and a half, leaving no name or contact information. After making several attempts on social media to find these people to come get their vehicle, I finally had to call the local police station to ask them to take care of it.

An officer came and he talked about putting a 72 hour notice sticker on it and then having it towed. At the mention of stickers my 6 year old blurted, "oh! Stickers! Can I have one?!" The policeman asked if my boy could come to the cruiser to get a few stickers. I said, "sure but, kid, are you sure? After 72 hours they will tow you away!" My boy groaned "moooommmm...." but at least the officer laughed.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/weinerlicker
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2016
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If you were to line five tow trucks up, how long would it be?

A foot!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DinosaurRigby9
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2016
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Child stubs toe- Thoughtful Dad says- " Better call a tow truck" Every.Single.Time. imgur.com/6GXxPz5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/chadt5382
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2013
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What’s the Podiatrist’s favorite vehicle?

A tow truck

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pscud
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2020
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Interesting food names

Chris P. Cream

Chris P. Bacon

Pete Zah

Barbie Q.

Q. Cumber

Okra Winfrey

Tom A. Tow

Zach N. Cheese

Drew Brie's

May N. Ace

Tuna Turner

Drew Berry

Parma Shawn

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Escalade1414
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2019
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What do you call an illegally parked frog?

Towed.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nashvillan615
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2018
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How many grammar nazis does it take to change a lightbulb?

Too.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/feedmesteak
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2018
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Me: that was the insurance company

Dad: what’d they say? Me: they’ll pay me for the tow Dad: why do they want your big toe?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheAbsentMinded1
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2019
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Where does a camper go?

anywhere it's towed.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/frankmcc
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
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What do you do when you get your toe stuck in the mud?

Call a toe (tow) truck!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/joanneshands
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2019
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The Joke that caused my dad to be "randomly selected for a drug test" at work.

To give a little background: My dad was a truck driver at the time, and he never saw something on the side of the road or that had a "free" sign on it that he could drive by without at least taking a look. My brother in law was a sheriff's deputy. He told this joke to my neighbor, I will try to do it justice.

My dad, his dispatcher(DIS), and lady neighbor(LN) are outside talking and it goes something like this:

Dad: Ugh, What a f--king week. I can not believe it.

LN: What happened?

Dad: I was in Georgia and I saw this cooler in the far corner of the rest area, just as you're about to leave. I looked around and I didn't see anyone... So I figured someone had forgotten it on their picnic... It was a nice ass cooler too. Igloo brand with the heavy duty wheels. It was beautiful.

LN: Let me guess, you took it and the food that was in it?

Dad: Oh god I wish, It was a nice cooler. So, I go over and I'm still looking around in case the owners are still there. So I get to the cooler and I

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/heythereanny
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2015
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