How does a snake threaten someone?
“Watch it or I’ll blow you to slithereens!”
An avalanche has started on Mount Everest that threatens to wipe out 20% of its surrounding area.
I threaten my children with trips abroad.
Whenever my Dad threatens someone
I'll wear you like a snowshoe!
My wife threatened to leave me because she says I have a bad sense of direction..
So I packed my stuff and right.
My boss is threatening to fire the employee with the worst posture.
I have a hunch it might be me.
Was making a bunch of math puns and was threatened to get punched so sent this
I think the girl at the Airlines check-in just threatened me.
She looked me dead in the eye and said, “Window or aisle?”
I laughed in her face and replied, “Window or you’ll what?”
My wife threatened to divorce me when I said I was going to give our daughter a silly name...
My wife is threatening to leave me because of my obsession with acting like a TV news anchor.
More on this after the break.
Live savings spent in a second
As the disgraced saucier was forced out of his former kitchen, he threatened impotently:
"you will roux the day!!!"
My wife is threatening to leave me unless I grow up and stop playing games
Twitter has gone too far! Now they're banning Mario for threatening the President.
Evidently he found out that Trump was in Peach twice.
My wife is always threatening to harm me if I keep stealing her kitchen utensils...
but that’s a wisk I’m willing to take.
How do you soundproof windows?
You give them the silent treatment
Swarms of flying insects are threatening people all over the city.
The police have deployed all SWAT teams.
My wife is threatening to leave me because I’m addicted to wearing a new T-shirt every half an hour.
I said, “Wait! I can change!”
My wife threatened to leave me unless I take my iguana to the vet.
She says I have a reptile dysfunction.
My wife said she'll leave me, if I ever cheated on her.
My wife threatened to leave me if I didn't stop making Shrek puns
So I guess our relationship might as well be ogre.
My wife threatened to kick me out of the house if I did not stop acting like a Flamingo.
That was when I put my foot down!
Some guy just threatened to attack me with a neck of a guitar.
The Monkees are touring Switzerland and my wife threatened to leave me unless we flew out there to see them. I thought she was joking.......
Then I saw her face, Now we're in Geneva.
I’ve been bored recently,
so I started to take up fencing. The neighbors threatened to call the police if I didn’t put it back.
My girlfriend threatened to leave me if I didn't stop pointing out random exits and entrances.
I said: "There's the door."
I can't take my dog to the pond anymore because the ducks keeps attacking him.
I guess that's what I get for buying a pure bread dog.
I washed a few $20's the other day...
A very angry IRS agent called me and threatened me with serious fines and jail time for committing tax fraud.
I guess they take money laundering very seriously....
My wife threatened to leave me over my obsession with Blur
My wife threatened to leave me because of my obsession with optical illusions.
I told her, "Wait, this isn't what you think it is!"
I haven't kept up my subscription to the Scrabble club....
Now they have started sending me threatening letters.
A tree threatened to bite me
My wife threatened to leave me over my bad sense of direction... I beat her to it though.
I packed up my stuff and right!
My girlfriend is threatening to leave me because of my obsession with acting like a TV news anchor.
More on this after the break.
My boss is threatening to fire the employee with the worst posture.
I have a hunch that it might be me.
My boss is threatening to fire the employee with the worst posture.
I have a hunch it might be me.
My wife is threatening to leave me because of my obsession with acting like a TV news anchor.
More on this after the break.
My wife is threatening to leave me because of my obsession with acting like a news anchor.
More on this after the break.
My wife is threatening to leave me because of my obsession with acting like a TV news anchor.
More on that after the break.
My boss is threatening to fire the employee with the worst posture.
I have a hunch it might be me.
My wife is threatening to kick me out of the house because of my obsession with acting like a news anchor.
More on this after the break.
My boss is threatening to fire the employee with the worst posture.
I have a hunch it might be me.
My wife is threatening to kick me out of the house because of my obsession with impersonating a news anchor...
More on this after the break.
My boss is threatening to fire the employee with the worst posture.
I have a hunch it might be me.
My wife threatened to leave me because of my obsession with the Monkees.
I was skeptical at first, but then I saw her face...
My wife is threatening to leave me because of my obsession with wearing different clothes every half an hour.
I said, “Wait, I can change.”
My girlfriend threatened to leave me if I didn't stop pointing out random exits and entrances....
I said "There's the door"
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