Arizona DOT let the public vote on the names of their three new snow plows. Here are the winners.
What’s the difference between an old public transport stop and a lobster with abnormally large breasts?
One is a crusty bust station and the other is a busty crustacean
The Invisible Man is a great public speaker.
Did y’all hear about the new law that was passed in Hawaii? You can no longer laugh in public.
All that is now allowed is a low “ha”.
Archeologists have found that ancient Egyptian culture was involved in developing the public transportation model still seen globally today.
So much so that they centered their religious and cultural life around the worship of a new bus.
How to you tell the difference between a scientist and a public worker?
Ask them to say the word unionized. (Un-ion-ized) (union-ized)
what do you call it when you spot your EX out in the public looking bad?
Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local public swimming pool
So I gave him a glass of water.
How did the Pope get paid for his public appearance?
Some friends wanted to get married at the public library, but they couldn't...
Because it was booked.
-My Pops
Did you know kids now have a slang term for the best public transportation?
What did the cop say to the man peeing in public?
When you enter a public restroom, what do you call the fifth sink in the row?
Cinco.
I came up with this last night, while tired. Forgive me.
Why did the elephants get kicked out of the public pool?
They kept dropping their trunks.
Did you know that every car going to and from the church on Sunday is a type of public transportation?
They’re all Mass transit.
I just had an half hour argument with my 5 year old about the importance of wearing pants in public, and she won.
So today I’m wearing pants to take her to school.
Where is the only acceptable place to fart in public?
Why did the French guy leave the public swimming pool?
Whats the perfect job for a person who blasts music in public?
What you call it when a ghost uploads your personal information to the public
Why was the salad arrested for public nudity
I'm dyslexic and I accidentally boarded the wrong method of public transportation.
The public pool sector must be taking a real dive right now
Why did the teacher never fart in public?
After many years of therapy, my psychologist has finally cured me of the desire to sit in the corner in public and blow on people that walk by! But now I have the urge to wear teen idol t-shirts and lean against the wall...
Long time fan, first time poster.
What do you call bread that doesn’t want its name out in the public
One of the best parts of public restrooms? Grout puns!
Egyptian Council Leader: the public transport in Cairo is terrible.
Egyptian Transport Secretary: We need a new bus
Did you hear about the teddy who got arrested for public indecency?
Public Service Announcement: In order to meet the energy budget for 2020....
the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.
Thank you and have a nice day.
I can't believe the lights in the public bathroom went out
now i can't see Jack shit
My friend tried to delay the inevitable by locking himself in a public bathroom...
People! The public bathrooms are for peeing only!
Either you're in, or you're out!
The cops caught me having sex with a clock in public again
It looks like I'm doing time
I tried to start a conversation in the public restroom...
but everyone was occupied
When you do something wrong at a public place, the police is looking down on you.
Did you hear about the teacher that was afraid to fart in public?
She had to become a private tooter
The missus just told me airlines are selling their ready meals to the public.
Dad: They'll never take off.
My wife told me that a sci-fi horror series centered around geek culture could never make it big in the public sphere.
But I've seen stranger things.
Did you hear about the fraction that was arrested for drinking whiskey in public?
What was the rap name of the Jewish guy with a fear of public speaking?
Isreali Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu has lately fallen out of popularity with the public. He looks set to be suceeded by the progressive Benjamin Netangoogle.
Friend asked why I never used the public restrooms
Because I'm not a party pooper.
My girlfriend was taking her time in the public restroom
You might even say she was stalling.
A son asks his dad: "Why is there always pee in the public showers?"
His dad responded: "Otherwise it would just be ublic showers."
Why couldn't the teacher fart in public?
Why did the elephants get kicked out of public pool?
For dropping their trunks
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