Yoda and Luke are walking through the swamp. Part of their usual training course involves shimmying along a cliff ledge, but today, thereโ€™s a long break in the ledge they canโ€™t cross. โ€œSomething for this I have.โ€ Yoda says.

He reaches into his bag and takes out a bunch of regular dinner table forks and a roll of duct tape.

He tapes several forks together to make a bridge and lays it down, allowing the two of them to get across.

When they get back to Yodaโ€™s hovel, they find that some creature has chewed a hole in the fence around Yodaโ€™s garden.

โ€œSomething I have for this.โ€ Yoda says again. Once again, he takes a bunch of forks out of his bag and, using duct tape, tapes them in to patch the hole.

Yoda and Luke return to Yodaโ€™s home, where Yoda looks through his bag. Heโ€™s used all his forks but one, he discovers.

โ€œThatโ€™s ok Master." Luke says, wanting to be helpful. โ€œIโ€™ll write us a note reminding us to buy more.โ€

So he writes the note and uses the very last fork to pin it to the bulletin board.

He looks down at Yoda expecting pride, but instead finds a look of horror.

โ€œMaster Yoda!โ€ he asks. โ€œWhat did I do wrong?โ€

Yoda replies sagely, โ€œA Jedi uses the forks for no ledge and the fence. Never for a tack!โ€

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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/madazzahatter
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 04 2020
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Why couldnโ€™t Shrek leave his swamp?

Because he was under marshal law

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 4
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/XxDragonSkyxX
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 16 2020
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what do you get when you cross a swamp monster with a bean?

The creature from the black legume!

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 18
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/psychodelicasies
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 13 2020
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What creature do you follow to find your way out of a swamp?

A navi-gator.

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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/tyrannosaur85
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 14 2020
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Yoda and Luke are walking through the swamp. Part of their usual training course involves shimmying along a cliff ledge, but today, thereโ€™s a long break in the ledge they canโ€™t cross... reddit.com/r/Jokes/commenโ€ฆ
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 4
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/FarPrince
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 21 2019
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Who do you ask for help when your lost in a swamp?

A naviGATOR

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 5
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/litrickmadthicc
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 15 2019
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What do you call a Chinese swamp monster?

Chiang Kai-Shrek

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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/MemeItUp666
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 01 2018
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What's the best food to eat when you're feeling anxious in a swamp?

marsh-mellows.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/the_arab_shrek
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 06 2019
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My town was trying to pave over the swamp in the middle of town for a new Kmart but the large water fowl with long beaks and a large throat pouches would not move...

They were a species of peliwon'ts.

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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/thomasbrakeline
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 07 2019
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Why is a bad Spanish swamp kind of sweet?

Because it's a marsh malo.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/ScottDecca
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 09 2018
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What letter makes the best swamp?

W

Because itโ€™s a Bi-U

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 4
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/StrangeResolve
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 03 2018
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I donโ€™t want to be swamp stressed.

I want to be marsh mellow.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 5
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/RichNCrispy
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 26 2018
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Why do crocodiles never become swamp upper management?

They aren't good dalligators!

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 4
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/JoshWithaQ
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 28 2017
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Did you hear about the kidnapping in the Louisiana swamp yesterday?

Good thing he woke up before it got dark...

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 7
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/headexpl0dy
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 15 2015
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What did the swamp say to the marsh?

I like being bayou

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/ProfessorTairyGreene
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jun 24 2014
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while watching swamp people...

a hunter stabbed a gator behind his head with a knife. my dad said, "you know what they call that? a pith. and if he does it wrong, he'll really pith that gator off."

completely straight-faced, didn't even chuckle at his own joke. maybe one day I'll be that much of a natural.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/vitaminj08
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jun 02 2014
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Iโ€™m voting for the Rock for president..

Dwayne the swamp!

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 8
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/LTenaciouSD
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 12 2021
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Sometimes, when you find yourself walking through a shallow pool for no reason...

...you have to stop and ask yourself what youโ€™re wading for...

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/sully1227
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 09 2020
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The bartender was swamped, so I told the gal standing next to me, โ€œLet me bayou a drink.โ€

She looked at me and said:

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 5
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/SapperInTexas
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 08 2014
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Moving my family to a wetland partially covered with water has been overwhelming...

I've been swamped!

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/thomasbrakeline
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 01 2020
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Drew another puzzle. Post your guesses! imgur.com/MX66hEs
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 36
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/tiggidytom
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 11 2015
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Doing a Yoda workout is much more difficult than it appears.

Talking backwards is easy, but finding a Jedi that will carry you through a swamp is damn near impossible.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/CMMIV
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 05 2019
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Hear about the funny gator, that kept missing his family?

Too swamped with hunters

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/GoldenGirlsGoneWild
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 13 2019
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A couple walk into a hardware store

They ask: are you guys going to get any more evaporative coolers? The employee answers: Iโ€™m not sure, weโ€™ve been pretty SWAMPED recently so for now weโ€™re all out.

***Was I the employee in this story? ...yes

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 4
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/zazuachu
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jun 29 2018
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I wrote quite the Dad joke...

What's the best kind of swamp?

The kind that wants to be bayou.

(HEH)

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/givinanlovin
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 14 2015
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Full Beaver

We're on a road trip and my mom, a biologist, says that the moon tonight is a "Full Beaver" which used to mean that it was the last night to set beaver traps before the swamp freezes over.

My dad replies: "Wow, the last time I saw a full beaver was when that girl at the concert had a wardrobe malfunction."

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 16
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/speederaser
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 26 2015
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At work and my manager was reminding us our deadline to complete our computer-based Internet security class...

A coworker asks, "I'm swamped with work this weekโ€” what if I can't get around to it?"

Cutting my manager off I say, "You'll be sleeping with the phishers, see?"

[five second pauseโ€”queue collective groan]

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 34
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/yessayason
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 11 2015
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Manager dadjoked us in the morning meeting

Context: I work at an aerospace company. There are two airlines that just contacted Us for work cost estimates: Lion Air and TigerAir. Designer: "I'm swamped with this Lion Air quote, I'll have to push Tiger's to tomorrow..." Manager: "Lions, tigers, and Baers, oh my!" (Baer is a private charter airline) He stood in the corner after that as we groaned.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/lorryguy
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 12 2016
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