Ever heard of a montana sex stone?
How much did a single pyramid stone weigh?
I used to think that only sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me.
Until I fell in a printing press.
I have started carrying a piece of stone with me to throw at people who sing Christmas songs before Thanksgiving.
It’s my jingle bell rock.
Maybe a rolling stone gathers no moss...
.....but a moving ceiling fan, sure gathers a lot of dust.
Dr. Stone comment section at its finest
https://preview.redd.it/ujv35rwei5m61.png?width=715&format=png&auto=webp&s=7a7478572fc765d48ca4306bc44262caf8027e8b
What kind of stone isn't an opal?
Need your best rock/stone based puns
I play dnd and my bard is very annoyed, that our party's druid, who is an earth genasi (appearance was described as a living statue)) won't give anyone his name.
So my bard will only address them with rock based puns until they properly introduce themselves.
I painted a four leaf clover on my wife's foam stones ...
Because they are SHAM-rocks!
Barry Allen likes to listen to The Rolling Stones when he workouts
His favorite is “jumpin’ jack flash”
I always believed that 'sticks and stones would break my bones, but words would never hurt me.'
Until I fell into a printing press.
The doctor today told me I had kidney stones.
It really rocked my world.
I taught my kid to speed read today. He read Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone in 3 hours!
I know its only 6 words.. but its a start!
Wanna hear a joke about a stone?
Never mind, I will just skip that one.
I found a cool rock in my father-in-law's yard. FIL- Oh that's a native American fertility stone. Me- Really! How can you tell? FIL- ....
I always loved The Rolling Stones
Just had a dealer try to sell me a piece of stone he said was from Ireland and kissed by St Patrick. When I looked underneath it said 'Made in China.'
This one went by cold with the rest of the chat. Stone-cold.
What is Stone Cold Steve Austin’s favourite gaming console?
Iron man yielded infinity stones and after the snap, due to stones’ immense power, he died!
Apparently, it turned out to not be his strong suit!
A stone thrown into a pond in 1990 has been wet for around 30 years.
Why did the stone mason break up with the con artist?
He was taken for granite.
My son didn't like sharp stones on the seafloor at the beach
You haven't got kidney stones, have you? Because that would mean urine trouble!
I’m two stone lighter this morning.
Did you hear about the plant that looked like a stone?
I heard my teacher said"Two birds one stone"
Whatever they asked me, i was not high and i don't know those birds.
I taught my kid speed reading and I’m proud to say that he managed to finish “Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone” in an hour and a half.
I know it’s only six words, but it’s a start.
When early man discovered that they could use sharp stones for hunting, it was a big deal.
It was cutting edge technology
I hired the Rolling Stone dercorators to style my room. They did a terrible job.
They just painted it black. I couldn't get no satisfaction with it.
My vision was light blue walls but I guess I always can't get what I want.
Where are all the stone miners?
What did the artist say after finishing his huge picture sculptured of stone?
Leaf no stone unturned until all heads roll.
The blarney stone has lost its power
Now it's just a sham rock
A stone with a lot of achievements is a roll model.
I like to slap stone statues on their behind sometimes.
What do you get when you paint stone light green?
Did you hear the one about the stone mason who was married to a con artist?
She took him for granite.
I carry a stone with me to throw at anyone who sings Christmas carols before Thanksgiving.
It is my jingle bell rock.
I always carry a stone with me to throw at people who sing Christmas songs in October.
I call it my jingle bell rock.
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