Sonny Bono
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📅︎ May 05 2021
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My wife and I like to listen to Sonny Bono's singing partner on special occasions.

It's time we Cher together.

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📅︎ Jul 23 2019
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Let me give you some pearls of wisdom, sonny boy.

Well to be perfectly honest, in my humble opinion, of course without offending anyone who thinks differently from my point of view, but also by looking into this matter in a different perspective and without being condemning of one's view's and by trying to make it objectified, and by considering each and every one's valid opinion, I honestly believe that I completely forgot what I was going to say.

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👤︎ u/derawin07
📅︎ Jun 25 2018
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My friend and i went as Sonny and Cher for halloween
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👤︎ u/joykin
📅︎ Nov 02 2013
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An old lady walks into her bank and asks the teller "Hey sonny, can you check my balance?"

So he pushed her over..

👍︎ 56
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📅︎ Aug 07 2015
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If you ever get an opportunity to go to dinner with the late Sonny Bono's wife, do it.

She loves to Cher.

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📅︎ May 09 2017
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Lol
👍︎ 85
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📅︎ Apr 01 2019
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Home Depot checkout line is as good a place as any for a dad joke

I needed to run to Home Depot just a little while ago, and my eight year old son has been driving my wife insane, so he was sent with me. He asked a hundred questions about what tool does what and why I needed this or that. Despite my distracted supervision, he surely mixed up several loose nuts and bolts.

At the exit of the self checkout line, there's a massive gumball machine that holds massive gumballs. I rarely carry change, so he's out of luck.

Sonny Boy: Dad, can I have a quarter?

Me (checking out): Nope. Don't have one.

Sonny Boy: You don't have any cents?

Me: If I had any cents, I'd have left you at home tonight.

No, he didn't get it, and I'm shocked he set it up so well by saying cents. But, the dude in the line next to me let out a solid guffaw. We made the satisfying, knowing eye contact of two dad joke aficionados. I'm glad someone else heard it.

👍︎ 2k
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👤︎ u/dtsjr
📅︎ May 28 2014
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Just yellow please

One day, an elderly woman was walking along the street, coming home from the supermarket. Her bag of groceries was especially heavy that day, and as she passed Nathan Hale's Used Cars, she got an idea that she could drive herself to the store and save a lot of shoe leather, time and aching muscles. She walks into the car dealership and, as it just so happens, gets the owner himself. He asks her what kind of car she wants and she replies,

"Well, sonny, I can't remember the name exactly, but it has something to do with hate or anger."

The owner replies, "Well, let's see... Oh yes, you want a Plymouth Fury! We have a couple on the lot. What color do you prefer?"

The lady has some trouble explaining the exact color to him, so she reaches into her shopping bag, takes out an ear of corn, strips down the shucks and says, "I want this color sonny."

To which Nathan replies, "Ma'am I'm sorry, but we don't have any in this color. Could I show you a nice blue one?"

"No son, I want this color."

"But ma'am, they didn't make that color! Maybe a cherry red one would suit you?" says the owner, obviously worried about losing a sale.

By this time, the old lady gets mad, and starts throwing things at the owner, thereby chasing him out of the office and into the lot. One of the salesmen, coming into the office from the back door, notices the disruption and asks the secretary what the old woman was so upset about.

The secretary replies, "Apparently, Hale hath no Fury like the woman's corn!"

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📅︎ Jul 08 2019
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What did the mom say to her kids when they asked "how's the weather and what should we do with our toys?"

Sonny and Cher.

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👤︎ u/2donutkid2
📅︎ Oct 18 2018
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When I was upset as a child, my Dad would always walk in my room, say this with a stone cold face, and then walk out.

Dad: Son I know you're upset. Know what my grandfather used to tell me when I was feeling this down?

Me: sniff What, Dad?

Dad: He would tell me, "Sonny, you stay here, I'm going upstairs to fuck your grandma."

....he also tells my friends this when they come over upset.

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👤︎ u/Zach50295
📅︎ Oct 22 2013
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