Short Term Memory Puns

Imagine the damage alcohol can do.

And 2: with my short-term memory

I bet it was really interesting.

Oh and by the way, did I mention that I also have short term memory loss?

I forgot the punchline.

I hope it doesn't run in the family, as my dad has it.

But then I forgot what it was.

Her: How bad is it?

Me: How bad is what?

I forgot

I honestly can’t remember a single time I’ve ever forgotten anything.

Hello, welcome to the mental health hotline.

If you have obsessive compulsive disorder, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are codependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personality syndrome, press 3, 4, 5, and 6.

If you suffer from paranoid schizophrenia, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mothership.

If you are hearing voices, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic depressive, it doesn't matter which button you press. No one will answer anyway.

If you are dyslexic, press 96969696969696.

If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the pound button until a representative comes on the line.

If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's and grandmother's maiden names.

If you have post traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 911.

If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the beep. Or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short term memory loss, please try you call again in a few minutes.

If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our representatives are busy.

Short-term memory loss

So my dad texted me with some movie recomendations

Dad:"have you seen Momento? It's about a guy who loses his short term memory"

Me:"Sounds familiar but I'll check it out. Is it on Netflix?"

Dad:"Yeah. it's a thriller where the story goes backwards"

Five minutes later....

Dad:"Have I told you about the movie where a guy loses his short term memory?"

God dammit dad...

Just think what alcohol can do!

Dad: it's over-rated

Mom: what is?

Dad: what?