Why was the snowman rooting around in a bag of carrots?
Next time you’re feeling down, just remember: your plants are rooting for you. Literally!
19 and 20 fought yesterday. I was rooting for 19, but alas...
Crabgrass in my lawn is always fighting to prevent good grass seed from rooting...
Guess you could say I'm caught in the middle of a turf war
My dad and I were watching basketball the other day when his dog (Sophie) hopped up onto the couch beside him. He turned to her and said, "Who are you rooting for Sophie? The underDOG??!!!"
How do you make a root beer float?
Give him a lifejacket!
From my 7 yr old.
I put my root beer in a square glass
If humans were trees, how deep would the roots be ?
What does the square root of 2 like to describe something awesome as?
My lumberjack friend told me that he'd cut down a total of 13,207 trees.
When I asked how he managed to keep count,
He replied, "I keep a log"
My friend asked if I knew about growing root vegetables.
I told him I just know of a neighbor who grows them. I haven’t dug deeper.
My girlfriend is the square root of -100.
A perfect 10 but purely imaginary.
I poured root beer in a square glass, now I have only beer
If your book is made of root vegetables...
You’re doing a taro reading!
So I've lost a bag of cruciferous root vegetables...
...but it's okay, I'm sure they'll turnip somewhere.
Why can't athiests use exponents?
Because they don't believe in a higher power.
Did you guys hear Ozzy Osbourne drank root beer in space?
What's the only root veggie that comes with a warning?
I was showing off my hibiscus plants to my neighbor, he says the roots are exposed, and I should get more dirt on them.
So I found out they were both having affairs, and stealing from their company's fundraisers!
Why did the tree cross the street?
They were opening a new branch on the other side
I finally realized why trees don’t have teeth.
Turns out, they’re all bark and no bite.
I still remember the moment when my math professor told us what the square root of -1 was.
What did the number 2 say to number 4?
I'm always rooting for you
Dad: I really don’t trust these trees
Son: Huh? What? Why?
Dad: They seem kinda…. shady
Movie pitch: A pandemic is unleashed by ticks that live on and around the mouths of alpacas. Global chaos ensues as the disease wipes out 99% of humanity.
Desperate survivors are forced to live in a post-alpaca lip tick wasteland.
Square root? Or cube root?
The bank want to repossess my tree house. They say I haven't kept up my mortgage payments....
I'm convinced it's a mix up from when I moved branches.
I reported my root garden missing to the police.
They told me they’d see what would turnip. Then they told me it wasn’t their beet. I don’t think they carrot all!
How do you change root beer into beer?
You pour it into a square cup.
I know it's bad but leaf me alone... you're the root of all my problems.
did you hear about the buddhist who refused novocain during a root-canal?
he wanted to transcend dental medication.
The root of good math jokes is
The teacher asked if anyone knew the square root of negative one...
I put my root beer in a square glass
My girlfriend is like square root -100
A straight 10 but imaginary too
My girlfriend is the square root of - 100
She's a perfect 10, but completely imaginary
My girlfriend is like the square root of -100.
A solid 10, but also imaginary.
If I poured root beer into a square glass,
I poured root beer into a square glass
What do you get when you put root beer in a square glass?
I poured root beer into a squared glass...
If I pour root beer into a square glass
I pour my root beer into a square cup.
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