It was radical
Perfect 10, but purely imaginary.
I mean that's just not rational.
It was a loco motive.
[Looking over cart full of TP]
Me: "Nice to meet you Rationing, I'm Hoarding"
"It's the numbers you use to call your imaginary girlfriend."
To protest the Unagi Ration.
Half of what I say makes sense
Because they always make sound decisions.
Only a fraction of people would get this.
After all, they're sub-optimal.
It wasnβt a very rational decision though.
Alliter o' rations.
But the other 2 are
A Οthon
- The ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter = Eskimo Pi2. 2000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton3. 1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 microscope4. Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement = 1 bananosecond5. Weight an evangelist carries with God = 1 billigram6. Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour = Knotfurlong7. 16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone = 1 Rod Serling8. Half of a large intestine = 1 semicolon9. 1,000,000 aches = 1 megahurtz10. Basic unit of laryngitis = 1 hoarsepower11. Shortest distance between two jokes = A straight line12. 453.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake13. 1 million-million microphones = 1 megaphone14. 2 million bicycles = 2 megacycles15. 365.25 days = 1 unicycle16. 2000 mockingbirds = 2 kilomockingbirds17. 52 cards = 1 decacards18. 1 kilogram of falling figs = 1 FigNewton19. 1000 milliliters of wet socks = 1 literhosen20. 1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche21. 1 trillion pins = 1 terrapin22. 10 rations = 1 decoration23. 100 rations = 1 C-ration24. 2 monograms = 1 diagram25. 4 nickels = 2 paradigms26. 2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital = 1 IV League27. 100 Senators = Not 1 decision
Pyre Square
I responded "I guess you can say he was only here for a fraction of the class." my classmates are not happy with me.
With Tac-taco rations
I've been hardcore PMSing lately, so I made brownies. I messed up the recipe somehow so, rationally, I started crying because I really wanted homemade brownies.
He walks in, hugs me, and says babe, it's okay. You're ovary-acting.
I totally believe in parenting similar to Calvin's father. As such, when my 6 year old son came to me and asked me why his index finger was shorter than his middle, I rationally explained to him that it had to be shorter because he'd poke his brain when he picked his nose.
It's been 3 weeks and he still believes me. :D
The show had a section about pi. My wife said something about it didn't make sense.
I responded, "It is not supposed to be rational."
I am on the city council and we had a workshop about why utility rates are lower inside the city compared to outside.
It came down to this:
- No study was done to show the validity of the difference.
- It was strictly a policy decision with an arbitrary number.
- The reason for this approach was simply that it is "standard in the industry" and because it is "what every other city does".
Prefacing that I was a dad so I had to say it: I suggested the rational wasn't the most sound since "just because every other city jumped off a bridge, it didn't mean I wasn't going to jump off a bridge."
Mixture of groans and laughter.
Only a fraction of the people will get this joke
A Οton
