Someone who likes playing racing games online is...
You know the problem with watching someone play a racing game?
There's a rumour going around about two waves racing to the beach. Can you guess which one won?
What do you call a German racing movie?
I have some racing geese for sale.
Let me know if you wanna take a quick gander
What sound do drag racing street sweepers make?
A cheetah and a lion are racing in Africa
After the cheetah easily wins, the lion complains: "Man, you're a cheetah" and the cheetah says: "Naw man you're a lion".
What do you call someone who doesn't like racing of any kind?
I thought I'd try my hand at snail racing.
My thinking was that if I take their shells off, that they'd be lighter and quicker.
All it did was make them a bit sluggish.
I took the shell off of my racing snail in hopes that he'd be lighter and faster...
But now he's just sluggish
My friend and I were dolphin-back racing when he cut me off.
I was racing with my younger brother on the track, and then he got mad that I didn’t draw a finish line marker on the sand. We kept racing but he kept losing, and at one point he got so mad he threw a tantrum and started hitting and punching and kicking me furiously
.....and that’s when I drew the line.
Did you hear about the guy who used a racing game to get reputayion on Reddit, but it turned bad?
I took the shell off of my racing snail, thinking it would make him go faster. If anything it made him more sluggish.
A friend told me the Russians are best at racing.
I knew that was nonsense. People from Finland always Finnish first.
Who would win a racing competition among all the computer devices?
Can you name 3 places in Scotland that are also the names of Grand Prix winning racing drivers?
Ayr Town Centre!!!
Kiddy Dong Racing is the perfect example of a Spoonerism
Spoonerism: a verbal error in which a speaker accidentally transposes the initial sounds or letters of two or more words, often to humorous effect.
Aladdin banned from flying carpet racing! Sources say…
…for use of performance enhancing rugs…
My wife and kids are leaving me because of my obsession with horse racing.
We were racing against the clock, trying to figure out which spice was the one they wanted.
They screamed stuff like "we want more time" and "time is of the essence", but apparently they don't have any clue what it's called.
Two cats are racing in the water
One cat was named "One Two Three", the other cat was named "Un Deux Trois". Which cat won?
One Two Three, because Un Deux Trois cat sank.
I don't believe in racing competitions
Because all races are equal.
A few years ago I bought A great racing video game in Finland.
I think it's called "Finnish line".
5 snails were racing, all with the numbers painted on themselves.
The one in the 5th lane had a poorly drawn 5 on it and took off, faster than all the others. The crowd yelled out, look at that S-car go!
I tried drag racing the other day
It's murder trying to run in heels.
I watched a documentary about car racing, but I didn’t enjoy it as much as I thought.
Did you guys her about the racing snail that took off his shell?
Well after that he became a big sluggish.
I went to see Formula E racing the other day...
The atmosphere was electric!
My friend and I were racing our trucks...
I would've won, but I couldn't pickup the pace.
Indy Cars race in the Indy Racing League. If they raced in Ireland, it would be IRL IRL...
...You may roll your eyes at that, but wait until you see it in real life.
Then it would be IRL IRL IRL.
(...I gotta admit, he got me on that one.)
Why does the Buddha sit crossed legged when racing cars?
To achieve a perfect lap.
I used to own a racing snail you know...
I took its shell off to make it lighter, thus quicker.
But that just made it more sluggish...
Why does the moon always lose when racing the sun?
Because night skies finish last.
I’ve got racing geese for sale
Let me know if you want to take a quick gander
I thought I’d try snail racing
My tactic was if I take the shells off, they’ll be lighter and quicker,
All it did was make them a bit sluggish
I took the shell off my racing snail, thinking it would make him faster. Unfortunately, it just seems to have made him sluggish.
For sale: some racing geese.
Let me know if you want to take a quick gander.
A cheetah and a lion are racing.
The cheetah wins
The lion says "man you a cheetah"
The cheetah says "nah man you a lion"
Took the shell off my racing snail to see if I could make it go faster...
Just made it a bit sluggish.
My wife and daughter are leaving me because of my obsession with horse racing...
My wife and my family are leaving me because of my obsession with watching horse racing on TV.
My wife and family are leaving me because of my obsession with horse racing.
did you hear about the racing snail?
he took off his shell so he would be faster but in the end he just felt a bit sluggish