My clothes were having a competition to decide which one is the coolest

It ended up being a tie

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FlarioKath
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2021
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What did the tailoring competition end in

A tie

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OkSurprise7755
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2021
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I entered the national rage competition after being told I was easily angered, but lost to a guy who was much angrier than me.

I was outraged.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MidDan
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2021
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Once again I've entered the annual tightest hat competition in our town, this year I'm just hoping..

..that I can pull it off.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2021
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I've entered a competition to win the entire ABBA back catalogue.

There's no second prize....

The Winner Takes It All.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2021
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I recently entered ten puns into a joke competition hoping I would win with at least one of them.

Unfortunately no pun in ten did.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pawnografik
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2021
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Did you hear about the new high school math competition they're calling "extreme "fractioning"?

It's intenths!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/spacegeese
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2021
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Santa's helpers are having a competition to see who can wrap the most amount of presents this year.

They are having a boxing match.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/speratcool88
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2021
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Overheard at a chemistry competition...

British chemist: "I'll kick your arsenic!"

American chemist: "I'll kick your astatine!"

Organic chemist: "I'll kick your acetate!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DENelson83
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2021
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My friend owns a winery and his wine was picked over others in a wine tasting competition by only one trait...

He won by a nose!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2021
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Found out that my nanna used to compete in banana eating competitions until she was caught cheating...

... Then they had to ban nanna

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πŸ‘€︎ u/repostssleuthbot
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2021
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Dr. Frankenstein entered a bodybuilding competition...

and soon discovered he seriously misunderstood the objective.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2021
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If the winner of a competition cries happy tears, what does the runner up cry?

Second tears.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/logansworth
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2021
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I'm currently having a competition with my son before his first birthday;

we're currently tied, but he's almost one.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OneDougUnderPar
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2021
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When it comes to decorating the Christmas tree, I've got a leg up on the competition. My cat says I passed out under the tree again, but I told her to stop pulling my leg.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/stalnoypirat
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2020
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They rescheduled the quarterly pogo stick competition.

They had to wait for the he spring.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shu-di
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2021
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What do you get for winning a muscle loss competition? /r/Jokes/comments/logfot/…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Satolah
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2021
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What happens if a cat wins a dog competition during a tornado?

A cathastrophy

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πŸ‘€︎ u/D4rk3rl1fe
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2020
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Why can’t Satan’s cheerleading squad win any competitions?

Because they have literally no chants in Hell.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JiminyKirket
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
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The guy who lost the fishing competition was really upset.

He was totally out of line.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/letsgetrandy
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
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The toucan once faced fierce competition in it's ecological niche.

Eventually, though, it came to dominate the toucannot.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/iep6ooPh
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
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I was in a cat competition that wasn't like your typical competition. They had a category for cat butts, which I ended up winning...

But it was just a cat-ass-trophy

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πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2020
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What do you a call a competition for computers?

A ChampionChip

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πŸ‘€︎ u/charmandernews
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2020
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The result of an art competition...

Is a draw.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/matthewrmshin
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
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I just won a teddy bear making competition with my kids.

Great stuff!

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2020
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Did you hear about the punctuation competition?

The winner got an apostrophe.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hideandsheep
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2020
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How did the bagel shop owner get rid of the competition on his block?

He ran a pretty intense schmear campaign

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NotA_Drug_Dealer
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2020
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Did you hear about all the competition in the outdoor pickled cabbage contest?

It was a krauted field.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/citrusguy9
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
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In a Student v.s. Teacher competition

who schools who?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TNormus
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2020
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I just came second in my city's big bubble blowing competition

I came so close to winning but I blew it

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NateTheSimpleOne
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13 2020
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A farmer won a competition. When he was told he won, he was so surprised.

They say he was outstanding in his own field.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ChungaChunga06
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2020
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In a village, far far away, two farmers often had a competition within themselves to see who harvests the most every 6 months.

After failing to win for about 9 times in a row, Jaime, hired a spy who will go and check Jack's harvest the night before the contest so he can harvest more. As the spy came back the night before, he informed the farmer Jaime about the amount that he saw inside Jack's yard but he was not able to tell the amount in exact. Jaime took the spy to his paddy field, gave him some extra money than what they initially agreed upon and said...

"You reap what you saw".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MShafiSatthar
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2020
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I refuse to vote for anyone in the dried fruit competition.

There aren't any good candied-dates.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ApologeticKid
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2020
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What’s the Highest Level of Competition That a Semi Professional Sauerkraut Pickler Aspires To?

The Briner Leagues.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/du_bekar
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2020
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My son seemed really upset that he came in last at the Karate competition.

He was kicking himself.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2020
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I reattached a cup holder to my son's car seat the other day. My daughter (5yo) taunted him, saying, "I have TWO cup holders!" I told her, "It's not a competition," to which she replied...

"But it is a CUP-etition!"

... I've never been so proud of her.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoshSamBob
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2020
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I've got a pedigree toothless Norwegian Blue Parrot I want to enter in competitions

I hope it sucks seeds

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hamsternoir
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2020
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Who would win a racing competition among all the computer devices?

USB Flash Drive

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πŸ‘€︎ u/archit14
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2020
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Hey did you hear that ESPN is broadcasting the 2020 Origami competition?

I heard it's pay per view...

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/k-810
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2020
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Recently went to a steak eating competition.

There was a lot of beef between the competitors.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zkck0517
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2020
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I won biggest shoe competition

It was a really big feat

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Red-Mario
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2020
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What do you call a goodlooking winner of a large suntanning competition?

Tan out of tan

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PLUMBUM2
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2020
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What do you say in a sitting competition?

Last man standing wins.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Stink-on-Reddit
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2020
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No one expected me to win the cereal eating competition

...but I've got some Trix up my sleeve

Inspired by a recent post here

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FabuPineapple
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2020
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I submitted nearly a dozen entries to a dad joke competition, hoping one would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BubzTheDeranged
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Overheard at an international chemistry competition

Said by a British chemist: "I'll kick your arsenic!"

Said by an American chemist: "I'll kick your astatine!"

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DENelson83
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2020
🚨︎ report

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