Ah finally. Da Queen
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DefNotInTheOven
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2021
🚨︎ report
If Queen Elizabeth farts during dinner, all the other guests are supposed to pretend as if nothing happened.

Noble gases have no reaction.

πŸ‘︎ 654
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2021
🚨︎ report
When REM met The Queen, she held up a stamped envelope and then said...

"That's me in the corner."

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ryanooooo
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2021
🚨︎ report
What did the man say to the Queen when she had allergies?

Bless you your sinus

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mikecrash
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2021
🚨︎ report
Why the Eel will never receive the title "knight" from the Queen of England?

Why the Eel will never receive the title "knight" from the Queen of England?

He won't knEel.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Funk_Monks
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2021
🚨︎ report
I once saw a guy playing Dancing Queen on a didgeridoo.

It was Abbariginal.

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/durangozac
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2021
🚨︎ report
what do you call a stoner queen?

a hempress

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/katomatic22
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2021
🚨︎ report
What did the queen say when a fellow threw some cheese at her?

How dairy!

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SuperGrandPatzer
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2021
🚨︎ report
I broke two queen CDs earlier...

...now i want to break free

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/superdolmiosauce
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2021
🚨︎ report
I dreamed I met a long snake-like fish who had been knighted by the queen.

It was Sir Eel.

πŸ‘︎ 45
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πŸ‘€︎ u/zenpod
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I got fired from my job at Dairy Queen

Because I refused to work on sundaes

πŸ‘︎ 55
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do kings and queens go to the dentist?

For a crown.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ScottyUrb
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2021
🚨︎ report
The right way of flirting
πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AligatorKS
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Why is a queen's staff called a septer?

Because everyone in the empire works.. 'cept her.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Epic_Mustache
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2020
🚨︎ report
A buddy of mine named his dog β€œ5 Miles” so he could tell people he walked 5 miles

But today he ran over 5 Miles

πŸ‘︎ 17k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GigaMike123
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2020
🚨︎ report
The Evil Queen was great at growing poisoned apples.

She was, however, terrible at cultivating evil pluots.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheGreatJava
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
If Queen Elizabeth was Hispanic

Her name would be " El Lizabeth "

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Slymood
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the queen who wasn’t sure how long she had ruled for?

She took a reign check.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2020
🚨︎ report
U2
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LeoCurre2038
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I listened to Queen albums for 12 hours in a row, and now I feel a little sick.

It must be the high Mercury content.

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the lactose intolerant queen say when the cook served her mac n cheese?

How dairy!

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Snugl-v203
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
🚨︎ report
What do ants take when they want to hallucinate ?

Antacid.

πŸ‘︎ 159
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2021
🚨︎ report
The evil queens mirror as been stolen.

Police are looking in to it.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tiger7971
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2020
🚨︎ report
How does the Queen (of England) stay so thin?

She keeps all her pounds in the bank.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ashtehstampede
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2020
🚨︎ report
What does the queen do before a night out?

Ensure her legs are queen shaven...

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jrgns
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2020
🚨︎ report
An ancient Egyptian queen with an especially flat chest was recently discovered.

Nevertiti.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DoomRulz
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call the kings and queens of the beverage kingdom?

The Royaltea

πŸ‘︎ 32
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Mary Queen of Scots. My favorite one, but She was found guilty of high treason and the Head of the Monarchy was then..

[removed]

πŸ‘︎ 52
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2020
🚨︎ report
It’s like Queen without Freddie.
πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2019
🚨︎ report
We often hear about the divine right of kings, but we should really be talking about the divine right of queens.

After all, queenliness is next to godliness.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ScravoNavarre
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2020
🚨︎ report
At an auction, I bought an old Nintendo game originally used by Queen Elizabeth.

Now I know how to properly use the royal wii.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I met a drag queen from the Greater Manchester area

He had a Wigan address

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/joefife
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2020
🚨︎ report
A queen heard thunder and asked one of her servants what was that sound?

The servant said lightning McQueen.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/1273_time
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do British chess players always win?

Because their queen never dies

πŸ‘︎ 69
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2020
🚨︎ report
First day of NYC kindergarten: kid1: are you from Queens?

Kid2: no, my parents are straight.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/godofbiscuitssf
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know that medieval kings and queens were carried...

...Litterally!

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lunkz3n
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2020
🚨︎ report
The Queen just knighted the first cow in history.

He is Sirloin.

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SoVeryKerry
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife acts like she doesn't know that I'm Joking

But then, I remember that she is JoQueen.

My children do the same thing, but then they're just kidding

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DeadlyHilarious
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2021
🚨︎ report
Why was the Queen in a hurry to get to the pool at Westminister?

She didn't want to be late for her chlorination.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Csteel97
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2020
🚨︎ report
If Queen Elizabeth farts during dinner, the other guests are expected to pretend as if nothing happened.

Noble gases have no reaction.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call the kings and queens of the coffee kingdom?

The Royaltea

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2020
🚨︎ report
If Queen Elizabeth accidentally farts during dinner, the other guests are supposed to pretend like nothing happened.

Noble gases should have no reaction

πŸ‘︎ 576
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bot_10
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2019
🚨︎ report

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