Pumas Puns

A list of puns related to "Pumas"

5 years ago I rescued a couple cute bunnies from three pumas. I brought them home, nurtured them to health, and kept them as pets. I wrote a story about it, but am too scared to publish it.

It's two hare-raising in my book. No even lion, odd right?

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👤︎ u/NicolasGojiraCage
📅︎ Apr 06 2022
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What would you do if a puma started to chase you?

I’d puma pants! 😂

That’s a real knee slapper!🦵🏻👋🏻

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👤︎ u/dirtydiaperdumpster
📅︎ Apr 21 2022
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Upcoming race between a puma and a race horse...

...

...

...

...

...

The horse is very fast but my money's on his opponent who is a shoe-in

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👤︎ u/MrSteveA
📅︎ Apr 19 2022
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A new clothing company called Partici is starting.

Their first product wil be pants, branded as the Partici pants.

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👤︎ u/Upvoter_NeverDie
📅︎ Jul 02 2022
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They say a puma can jump higher than your average house...

This is because puma's have powerful hind legs and the fact that houses can't jump.

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👤︎ u/robdingo36
📅︎ Apr 29 2021
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If I ever ran into a big cat in the jungle, I'd probably puma pants.
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👤︎ u/BinaryPeach
📅︎ Jun 16 2019
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Puma Pants
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👤︎ u/midgetmolester2
📅︎ Oct 17 2019
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What did the mountain lion say when it had to fart?

Puma finger.

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👤︎ u/bettsdraper
📅︎ Jan 20 2022
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Puma pants
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👤︎ u/Captainspookle
📅︎ Mar 12 2019
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A mountain lion has over 40 different names in English.
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👤︎ u/69pussywrecker69
📅︎ Feb 16 2019
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Elite
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👤︎ u/yo2borneelzinger
📅︎ Feb 12 2021
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Got chased by a big cat down the mountain today.

Nearly made me puma pants

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👤︎ u/Aristophanes771
📅︎ Jul 31 2021
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I do what I wanna do.
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👤︎ u/snorlax420__
📅︎ Mar 30 2020
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I asked my little kid if he wants to use the potty before going

He said no, he'll just Puma pants

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👤︎ u/Unknown_Kid7
📅︎ Sep 21 2021
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So I was taking a poo this morning..

.. and my SO knocks on the door. She says, "Hey you need to hurry up, I've got a mountain cat situation out here."

Confused, I replied "What does that mean?"

She said "I'm a puma pants."

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👤︎ u/r_plantae
📅︎ Jan 02 2018
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From r/memes
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👤︎ u/JoJoMcFearson
📅︎ Jan 12 2020
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Wow
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👤︎ u/Chatters01
📅︎ Jul 16 2018
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Saw a Florida Panther on my running path

Just about puma pants

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👤︎ u/AprilTowers
📅︎ Jul 20 2021
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Nike trousers
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👤︎ u/ntn_98
📅︎ Jan 13 2020
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I was hiking yesterday, when I suddenly ran in to a cougar....

Almost made me puma pants!

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👤︎ u/ElderHallow
📅︎ Aug 29 2020
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Classic
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👤︎ u/patmcheese
📅︎ Feb 18 2019
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Interesting...
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👤︎ u/jankovskijr
📅︎ Feb 19 2019
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I saw a cougar on a hike last weekend.

I nearly puma pants.

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👤︎ u/malker84
📅︎ Oct 13 2020
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These pants crack me up...

https://preview.redd.it/294ds0yrw2h51.jpg?width=1000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=59aecd04a9f1a84f21ea972df9bb31ca8d0bf046

Puma pants.

Pu...ma...pants.

Poo my pants.

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👤︎ u/ConstipatedGibbon
📅︎ Aug 15 2020
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Early morning work groans are the best groans

A little too proud of this one...

So I’m on my usual Tuesday morning conference call with a bunch of vendors, coworkers, bosses, etc...

With his dog barking in the background one of my bosses chimes in and says “Just so you all know, I’m on the call but I’m outside right now having my roof looked at so I might be a little distracted”.

I couldn’t resist... With the instincts of a wild puma plotting against it’s poor defenseless prey, I pounce...

“Is your dog lookin at it?

Cuz he keeps saying ROOF!!! ROOF ROOF!!!”

I was immediately rewarded with a spectacular cacophony of groans and “that was awful”’s... It was glorious. I’m pretty sure I’ll get another promotion for it.

EDIT: So... no promotion... but in a pure, hilarious coincidence, I actually DID just get the news that I'm finally getting that raise they promised me at my last review. Too fuckin funny.

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👤︎ u/OreoGaborio
📅︎ Apr 10 2018
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A large cat just carried off one of my tennis shoes!

It was a puma.

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Jun 14 2020
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What's the scariest cat

The one that made me puma pants.

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👤︎ u/ccococco
📅︎ Oct 02 2018
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You know what I would do if I saw a Mountain Lion while hiking?

I'd PUMA pants.

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👤︎ u/boop66
📅︎ Sep 04 2019
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Why does the blonde keep her shoes in a cage?

Because the shoes say "Puma"!

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👤︎ u/xxGandhiLover
📅︎ Oct 08 2018
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A big cat escaped its cage at the zoo yesterday

If I saw that I'd puma pants

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👤︎ u/command_613
📅︎ Sep 01 2016
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What do you call a mountain lion that always wants to be the center of attention ?

A puma-donna

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👤︎ u/johnbr
📅︎ Dec 29 2018
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Saw this gem on my way to work today

"If I came across a mountain lion, I would puma pants"

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👤︎ u/Emptydreamah
📅︎ Oct 16 2016
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What kind of pants do you get when you see a big cat?

Puma Pants.

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👤︎ u/WhiskeyBadger_
📅︎ Nov 14 2021
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I was hiking the other day when I suddenly saw a cougar.

Almost made me puma pants

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👤︎ u/Scottspears89
📅︎ Sep 07 2020
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I was hiking yesterday when suddenly I ran into a cougar!

almost made me puma pants

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👤︎ u/growupyall
📅︎ Aug 30 2020
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I met a mountain lion once,

he made me puma pants......

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👤︎ u/nirvanaspirit666
📅︎ Aug 06 2017
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If I ever saw a cat escape from the zoo

I'd puma pants

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👤︎ u/ShadowDaGamer
📅︎ Aug 14 2017
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